It's been three months since I last updated this blog. I would have to say that 33% of the reason was due to laziness (watched a lot of Euro 2012 (June), Tour de France (July), and London Olympics (August)), 33% due to low morale (finding it difficult to figure out what to do, who to speak with, what to say), and 33% due to concerns about privacy (I began to interview and meet people and didn't want to discuss any specific details). Anyway, I thought it appropriate to give my few readers a quick update.
Starting next week, I'll be working in a finance position for a large sports entertainment company. The position is temporary (until early 2013) and part time (3x a week). One of my friends who works there is taking maternity leave, so I am coming in to back-fill for her while she's out. I found out about the position availability directly from her since she knew I was looking for jobs. I went in for an interview a couple weeks ago and was hired last week.
I've been telling family and friends that I am "cautiously optimistic" about this opportunity. I am passionate about sports. I'll be using my MBA and developing a broader finance skill set. I'm intrigued by a lot of the spheres that come together in this job: sports, finance, journalism, the internet, blogging, etc. The main drawback is the pay cut that I took, exacerbated by the fact that it is a temp position and I'm only working part-time. However, after talking with my wife about it, we decided this was a really good opportunity for me, to try something new and work in an area that I'm passionate about. (Again, I'm very thankful that my wife has a well paying job that she enjoys and is fairly stable which provides me this opportunity to take a part-time position while supporting a child.) We are viewing it sort of as an internship. (I remember reading somewhere several months ago that job seekers who are trying to figure out what their passionate about should be open to doing temp jobs and internships to try out something). In this regard, I think this is a great opportunity for me to try it out and see if I like it. Even though it's a temp position, it'll help develop my skills and add a more diverse experience to my resume.
Besides doing well at my job, a secondary goal for me over the next few months will be to interact with a lot of different people, learn about their jobs, and hopefully get on people's radar. First, to see if this is something I want to do long term. And also, so that if/when a full time position becomes available in early 2013, they consider me for that position.
I think the various outcome scenarios all have good up-side: I love this job, and come early 2013, they want to hire me full time, then everything is great. I love my job, but they can't hire me in 2013, it's okay. I have added experience and I continue along with my job search then. If I find out that I don't like this job, then there's no hard feelings because it was a temp job anyway, and I tried it out and became better aware of what I'm looking for, what I like/dislike.
One concern the company had about hiring me was that they wanted to make sure I would commit to the entire time frame instead of flaking out if I found a full time position. I told them I would not accept full time employment elsewhere until my commitment to them was completed. This was something I was happy to commit to anyway because this was an intriguing opportunity and also since I was working with / referred by a friend. Ironically, just a few days after I accepted this position, I received a call back from a city government job I applied for several months ago, asking me if I was still interested in that position. Maybe they hired someone and it didn't work out, so now they were asking me, or maybe a new position opened up. Anyway, I let them know that I was locked up for 5-6 months, but would appreciate being considered if the position were still available then. It was encouraging that I was considered for that position as well.
If I were to grade myself on my level of effort in job searching over the last 3 months, I'd have to give myself an F-. Oh, I was horrible, embarrassingly bad. But, like so often in my life, God was ever gracious to me, so much more than I deserve. Even so, I think the process I went through back in February-May prepared me to jump at this opportunity when it came up. If I look back at what I'm passionate about and what my strengths are, this position meets a lot of the things I am looking for in a job. On paper, it looks like a good opportunity, and I hope it becomes one in reality. Also, I'm not sure, but I may not have considered this opportunity had it come up earlier in the process; I may have just dismissed it as another finance job. It's hard to know for sure though.
I don't think this blog will end just yet. I still need a full time job in 2013. And I also still need to figure out what I want to do with my life. There's still a lot of stuff to do. Perhaps I will post some updates when applicable, and restart this blog when I restart my full-time job search in 2013, For now, I am temporarily employed.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Thursday, May 31, 2012
And then there was one
This is another exciting week since my son will be starting daycare this Friday 3x a week, to give me time to interview and job search. The timing couldn't be more perfect as I have my first interview next week. Hopefully, the transition will be smooth for my son. So far, he has spent time alone in Sunday school for about a month and he's been baby-sat by family and friends for a few hours at a time. We'll see how he handles being apart from his parents for 8 hours at a time. Eventually, when I start working full time, we'll put him in daycare for the full week. I'm guessing that my wife will drop him off in the morning and I'll pick him up in the evenings. We'll have to see if that schedule is feasible depending on our jobs.
Hopefully, my time being a bum at home is moving to the next phase, which is more active job searching and networking. My mini-goals for the next couple of weeks are to prepare for my interview, update my LinkedIn profile, and start setting up more meetings with some of my old co-workers and b-school classmates. One of my friends suggested beefing up my LinkedIn profile as recruiters use it to find people.
This is a busy time of the year for us. Next weekend, we'll be traveling to upstate NY to have a mini-reunion with some college friends. And the following week, we'll be moving to a new apartment. Need to start packing.
On the SAHD front, today was a good milestone b/c I got my son to eat 4oz of yogurt, 6.5oz of baby food, 8oz of milk, and a bunch of cherrios. That's probably the most he's eaten in a day, though for his age, he should still be eating a lot more regularly. He eats about 6 times a day (9am, 11am, 2pm, 4:30pm, 7pm, 9pm) and each feeding takes 30-45 minutes. That's a lot of time sitting in front of him patiently scooping food into his mouth! My wrist actually starts hurting a bit because I have to tilt it at just the right angle to maximize the amount of food that gets into and stays in his mouth. It's like at a 45 degree angle. Man, seriously have a lot of respect for stay-at-home parents who do this for like years.
One of my friends posted this article to Facebook a while back. "Leaving Wall Street"
http://nplusonemag.com/leaving-wall-street
It's written by a former banker who is now in the Occupy movement. I think some of her descriptions of how Wall Street sees itself and the more subtle aspects of Wall Street culture resonated with me. Here are some of my favorites:
most people on Wall Street believe they have earned their jobs, and the money that follows.
it is often those who do not come from privilege who are the system’s fiercest defenders.
People on Wall Street truly believe they work harder than anyone else.
Wall Street employees quickly learn that even their company is an enemy. To the firm, employees are a cost to be minimized, or a producer to be exploited.
Many of the adverse reactions to OWS have been along the lines of, “They’re just jealous.” Of course the Wall Street critics think OWS is about envy. Envy is part and parcel of their daily lives. When you are living in a culture of envy, you see envy everywhere you go.
Wall Street is not a collection of 1 percenters maniacally laughing at the 99 percent they have crushed under their boot. No, Wall Street is far too self-absorbed to be concerned with the outside world unless it is forced to.
A part of me wants to write my own personal memoir about my very short time on Wall Street. It was something I wanted to do as part of this blog, and maybe I will later on, as a therapeutic exercise. For now, I like to read articles like this, or talk with people. Here are two analogies that I've made - not sure if they are applicable, but here they are:
1. Poor person wasting money analogy:
When I was in banking, I'd come home on the weekend or evening and just waste my time watching TV. One would think that with so little free time, you'd make better use of it. But I was so wired that I wanted to do something dumb and stress-free like sit in front of a TV. On weekdays, even though I came home late, I wanted to just watch something. On the weekends, even though I should be enjoying nature or planning something fun, I'd just watch TV a lot of the time. Then Sunday night would roll around and I'd feel depressed that I hadn't done anything all weekend. But I couldn't help myself.
When you see a poor person suddenly come across some money and they waste it, it's unfathomable to regular people. When you're struggling to make ends meet, why are you spending money on lottery tickets, a flat screen TV, etc. It seems like such a waste of money. You get so frustrated because you want to help but you can't.
Where they were poor in money, I was poor in free time. I had so little free time, that I forgot how to use it wisely. I lost my sense of priorities. I had no muscle memory of making better decisions. My habit was watching TV or surfing the web. When I came across some free time, I used it in such a pathetic way, that it got me and my wife angry. Hmm, this analogy is weak. On to #2.
2. Sad about the dead uncle who used to molest you analogy:
[Caveat: First, I was never ever molested, so this is purely theoretical. Second, it's probably not good to joke about molestation, so this joke will unfortunately offend some.]
If you have a hypothetical uncle who used to molest you, who died, first you are angry for all the hurt and pain and suffering he caused you. You feel sick thinking about how you felt dehumanized, taken advantage of, etc. His death brings forth all the repressed anger you thought you had dealt with. But also, when he dies, he is no longer in your life. People only say nice things at funerals, and you begin to remember those nice things too. He was a funny guy. He was a sweet man. Even with the horror. After a while, the pain becomes distant. You begin to miss him a little. But then, you remember the molestation. And you feel sick, angry at yourself for, even for a second, feeling any nostalgia and goodwill towards the horrible man.
Banking is my dead uncle who used to molest me. Do I need to elaborate? Banking sucked. But it had some good qualities - good pay, bonuses, prestige, padding resume, etc. When I quit, I was so happy. But after a while, the pain subsided. I started to remember the perks fondly, have some nostalgia for the long hours, the camaraderie that is borne through suffering. The ability to pay off grad school loans in one fell swoop. But then, I remembered how much it sucked. And I start getting angry at myself for, even for a second, feeling any nostalgia for the job.
Okay, this analogy doesn't work either. It's late, good night.
Hopefully, my time being a bum at home is moving to the next phase, which is more active job searching and networking. My mini-goals for the next couple of weeks are to prepare for my interview, update my LinkedIn profile, and start setting up more meetings with some of my old co-workers and b-school classmates. One of my friends suggested beefing up my LinkedIn profile as recruiters use it to find people.
This is a busy time of the year for us. Next weekend, we'll be traveling to upstate NY to have a mini-reunion with some college friends. And the following week, we'll be moving to a new apartment. Need to start packing.
On the SAHD front, today was a good milestone b/c I got my son to eat 4oz of yogurt, 6.5oz of baby food, 8oz of milk, and a bunch of cherrios. That's probably the most he's eaten in a day, though for his age, he should still be eating a lot more regularly. He eats about 6 times a day (9am, 11am, 2pm, 4:30pm, 7pm, 9pm) and each feeding takes 30-45 minutes. That's a lot of time sitting in front of him patiently scooping food into his mouth! My wrist actually starts hurting a bit because I have to tilt it at just the right angle to maximize the amount of food that gets into and stays in his mouth. It's like at a 45 degree angle. Man, seriously have a lot of respect for stay-at-home parents who do this for like years.
One of my friends posted this article to Facebook a while back. "Leaving Wall Street"
http://nplusonemag.com/leaving-wall-street
It's written by a former banker who is now in the Occupy movement. I think some of her descriptions of how Wall Street sees itself and the more subtle aspects of Wall Street culture resonated with me. Here are some of my favorites:
most people on Wall Street believe they have earned their jobs, and the money that follows.
it is often those who do not come from privilege who are the system’s fiercest defenders.
People on Wall Street truly believe they work harder than anyone else.
Wall Street employees quickly learn that even their company is an enemy. To the firm, employees are a cost to be minimized, or a producer to be exploited.
Many of the adverse reactions to OWS have been along the lines of, “They’re just jealous.” Of course the Wall Street critics think OWS is about envy. Envy is part and parcel of their daily lives. When you are living in a culture of envy, you see envy everywhere you go.
Wall Street is not a collection of 1 percenters maniacally laughing at the 99 percent they have crushed under their boot. No, Wall Street is far too self-absorbed to be concerned with the outside world unless it is forced to.
A part of me wants to write my own personal memoir about my very short time on Wall Street. It was something I wanted to do as part of this blog, and maybe I will later on, as a therapeutic exercise. For now, I like to read articles like this, or talk with people. Here are two analogies that I've made - not sure if they are applicable, but here they are:
1. Poor person wasting money analogy:
When I was in banking, I'd come home on the weekend or evening and just waste my time watching TV. One would think that with so little free time, you'd make better use of it. But I was so wired that I wanted to do something dumb and stress-free like sit in front of a TV. On weekdays, even though I came home late, I wanted to just watch something. On the weekends, even though I should be enjoying nature or planning something fun, I'd just watch TV a lot of the time. Then Sunday night would roll around and I'd feel depressed that I hadn't done anything all weekend. But I couldn't help myself.
When you see a poor person suddenly come across some money and they waste it, it's unfathomable to regular people. When you're struggling to make ends meet, why are you spending money on lottery tickets, a flat screen TV, etc. It seems like such a waste of money. You get so frustrated because you want to help but you can't.
Where they were poor in money, I was poor in free time. I had so little free time, that I forgot how to use it wisely. I lost my sense of priorities. I had no muscle memory of making better decisions. My habit was watching TV or surfing the web. When I came across some free time, I used it in such a pathetic way, that it got me and my wife angry. Hmm, this analogy is weak. On to #2.
2. Sad about the dead uncle who used to molest you analogy:
[Caveat: First, I was never ever molested, so this is purely theoretical. Second, it's probably not good to joke about molestation, so this joke will unfortunately offend some.]
If you have a hypothetical uncle who used to molest you, who died, first you are angry for all the hurt and pain and suffering he caused you. You feel sick thinking about how you felt dehumanized, taken advantage of, etc. His death brings forth all the repressed anger you thought you had dealt with. But also, when he dies, he is no longer in your life. People only say nice things at funerals, and you begin to remember those nice things too. He was a funny guy. He was a sweet man. Even with the horror. After a while, the pain becomes distant. You begin to miss him a little. But then, you remember the molestation. And you feel sick, angry at yourself for, even for a second, feeling any nostalgia and goodwill towards the horrible man.
Banking is my dead uncle who used to molest me. Do I need to elaborate? Banking sucked. But it had some good qualities - good pay, bonuses, prestige, padding resume, etc. When I quit, I was so happy. But after a while, the pain subsided. I started to remember the perks fondly, have some nostalgia for the long hours, the camaraderie that is borne through suffering. The ability to pay off grad school loans in one fell swoop. But then, I remembered how much it sucked. And I start getting angry at myself for, even for a second, feeling any nostalgia for the job.
Okay, this analogy doesn't work either. It's late, good night.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Little More Effort Please
Some good news to report. I have an interview scheduled in a couple weeks for the city government position in an operations/implementation role that I applied for. I'm looking forward to it and seeing if there's an opportunity for me there. In the meantime, in case this opportunity falls through, I plan on continuing to stick with my plan of meeting people, catching up with old co-workers and school friends, particularly starting in June when my son starts daycare 3x a week. This will free up some days for me to go meet people.
I met up with a former co-worker of mine from my banking job. She left several months before I did. We both are so happy to be out. She was updating me on the recent goings on at our old firm. Apparently several people we worked with also departed in the last couple months and also there was a round of layoffs. It reiterated my view that banks just churn junior staff and run them into the ground. If they leave, who cares - just hire a new batch and keep moving forward. The recent news about JPM CIO losing $2 bn and MS potentially selectively disclosing information in the run-up to Facebook's IPO doesn't surprise me. A bunch of people will get fired, and new people will back-fill those roles - just keep moving forward.
Several weeks ago, I was asking my wife what her hopes and dreams were for our son. She said, "I just hope he doesn't become a menace to society. No, I'm serious!" She was semi-serious. We both have a fairly laid-back attitude towards parenting, which some have commended us for. Neither of us grew up with Tiger parents. We grew up in non-competitive environments. We had fairly normal childhoods and we turned out okay. I think we want our kids to have something similar.
But I realized recently that I probably should be giving a little more effort - a little bit more deliberateness - in the parenting department. A couple weeks ago, we had a doctor's appointment for our son. His motor skills and mental development are on pace. However, he hasn't gained weight in a few months, causing some concern. The doctor told us we need to make a deliberate effort to feed him more food, things like bananas, avocados, bits of chicken, etc. It's quite likely that he's just going to be a small baby because he's Asian. Apparently, I was very small and refused to eat when I was very little. Still, this got me thinking a bit. I also realized my default these days is to sit on the couch, turn on the TV to Nickelodeon and have my son get distracted by the TV. Again, feeling a bit convicted that I need to be a bit more deliberate in being a SAHD.
When I think about psycho-intense parents, I find it repulsive. But this aversion and my sinfulness taints my view of any kind of effort put into parenting. It's so easy for me to self-righteously think to myself, "Oh, my hope is in Christ, not in my abilities as a parent. Look at those other people, idolizing their kids, making an idol out of their parenting abilities. Trying to make their life meaningful by being a good parent. Going crazy on the internet looking at this blog and that, becoming obsessed. Their lives are completely revolving around their kids. Look how unlike them I am." Obviously this line of thinking is wrong. I wrongly have different standards for me and others. When I read parenting books or buy educational DVDs, it's always in moderate amounts; but when others do it, it's because their psycho-intense.
So anyway, two realizations. First, I need to be more gracious when I hear about other people's kids. Whether it be trying to get into a competitive pre-school, their latest exploits posted to Facebook, or whatever. It's good to put a little effort into parenting. It's what we're supposed to do. Second, I need to be more deliberate in my parenting. I think I had the attitude that nothing really matters until around 1.5 years old when he can start talking and doing stuff. I recently bought some DVDs to begin teaching my son to learn letters and numbers. I'm also going to play with my son a bit more - helping him practice his motor skills. Right now, he can hold on to the side of the crib and walk a bit. When he reaches for things he shouldn't, I'm going to start saying "No" to him, before I just grab him and move him elsewhere. Maybe he'll start understanding. Also, I have to feed this guy more food. Need to put a little bit more effort please.
I met up with a former co-worker of mine from my banking job. She left several months before I did. We both are so happy to be out. She was updating me on the recent goings on at our old firm. Apparently several people we worked with also departed in the last couple months and also there was a round of layoffs. It reiterated my view that banks just churn junior staff and run them into the ground. If they leave, who cares - just hire a new batch and keep moving forward. The recent news about JPM CIO losing $2 bn and MS potentially selectively disclosing information in the run-up to Facebook's IPO doesn't surprise me. A bunch of people will get fired, and new people will back-fill those roles - just keep moving forward.
Several weeks ago, I was asking my wife what her hopes and dreams were for our son. She said, "I just hope he doesn't become a menace to society. No, I'm serious!" She was semi-serious. We both have a fairly laid-back attitude towards parenting, which some have commended us for. Neither of us grew up with Tiger parents. We grew up in non-competitive environments. We had fairly normal childhoods and we turned out okay. I think we want our kids to have something similar.
But I realized recently that I probably should be giving a little more effort - a little bit more deliberateness - in the parenting department. A couple weeks ago, we had a doctor's appointment for our son. His motor skills and mental development are on pace. However, he hasn't gained weight in a few months, causing some concern. The doctor told us we need to make a deliberate effort to feed him more food, things like bananas, avocados, bits of chicken, etc. It's quite likely that he's just going to be a small baby because he's Asian. Apparently, I was very small and refused to eat when I was very little. Still, this got me thinking a bit. I also realized my default these days is to sit on the couch, turn on the TV to Nickelodeon and have my son get distracted by the TV. Again, feeling a bit convicted that I need to be a bit more deliberate in being a SAHD.
When I think about psycho-intense parents, I find it repulsive. But this aversion and my sinfulness taints my view of any kind of effort put into parenting. It's so easy for me to self-righteously think to myself, "Oh, my hope is in Christ, not in my abilities as a parent. Look at those other people, idolizing their kids, making an idol out of their parenting abilities. Trying to make their life meaningful by being a good parent. Going crazy on the internet looking at this blog and that, becoming obsessed. Their lives are completely revolving around their kids. Look how unlike them I am." Obviously this line of thinking is wrong. I wrongly have different standards for me and others. When I read parenting books or buy educational DVDs, it's always in moderate amounts; but when others do it, it's because their psycho-intense.
So anyway, two realizations. First, I need to be more gracious when I hear about other people's kids. Whether it be trying to get into a competitive pre-school, their latest exploits posted to Facebook, or whatever. It's good to put a little effort into parenting. It's what we're supposed to do. Second, I need to be more deliberate in my parenting. I think I had the attitude that nothing really matters until around 1.5 years old when he can start talking and doing stuff. I recently bought some DVDs to begin teaching my son to learn letters and numbers. I'm also going to play with my son a bit more - helping him practice his motor skills. Right now, he can hold on to the side of the crib and walk a bit. When he reaches for things he shouldn't, I'm going to start saying "No" to him, before I just grab him and move him elsewhere. Maybe he'll start understanding. Also, I have to feed this guy more food. Need to put a little bit more effort please.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Free Time
Quick update on the job searching front. I submitted a resume and cover letter to a few project management positions in city government. It felt good to accomplish something tactical versus just trying to figure out what I want to do. Hopefully I will hear back for interviews soon and see how things go. My goal is to continue investigating jobs / companies that I may be interested in and applying for jobs or teeing up people to talk with starting in June.
I've thoroughly enjoyed watching the NBA playoffs and highlights of the final matches of the Premier League season this past week. I felt like this was a luxury I didn't have while I was working long hours. This past week, I was also able to read two books and prepare for and lead a Bible study (something I hadn't done in probably about five years). After church on Sunday, we walked to Shake Shack and ate burgers for lunch and had a good time. I remember being really stressed out after church on Sundays in the past because I knew I needed to go into the office for a several hours to get some work done. These are simple pleasures of life - the ability to watch TV on a weekday, eating a Sunday brunch stress-free, reading for pleasure - that I've missed and really appreciate now. These are things I look forward to continuing even after I get a job. Maybe I should continue to do blog posts about books that I've read to help me process my thoughts and reactions. I may start interspersing some of these on this blog. In the meantime, I need to find another good book to read.
I've thoroughly enjoyed watching the NBA playoffs and highlights of the final matches of the Premier League season this past week. I felt like this was a luxury I didn't have while I was working long hours. This past week, I was also able to read two books and prepare for and lead a Bible study (something I hadn't done in probably about five years). After church on Sunday, we walked to Shake Shack and ate burgers for lunch and had a good time. I remember being really stressed out after church on Sundays in the past because I knew I needed to go into the office for a several hours to get some work done. These are simple pleasures of life - the ability to watch TV on a weekday, eating a Sunday brunch stress-free, reading for pleasure - that I've missed and really appreciate now. These are things I look forward to continuing even after I get a job. Maybe I should continue to do blog posts about books that I've read to help me process my thoughts and reactions. I may start interspersing some of these on this blog. In the meantime, I need to find another good book to read.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Mini-Goals
Last week, I met up with a college friend for coffee. He was recently laid off from his job at a hedge fund and spent some time abroad to reflect and is now in the thick of job hunting again. He too is considering using this opportunity to do a career change. Talking to him was very good for me. I realized that I should be a bit more diligent and methodical than I have been. We agreed to set some milestones to accomplish and meet again in mid-June to stay accountable to hitting those mini-goals. My mini-goal for mid-June is to have 3-5 clear jobs / careers identified that I want to pursue and then have identified 1-2 people in each of those paths that I need to talk with to learn more about it, and start talking with people in early June. I was sharing that I've done some high level soul searching. And later on, I can execute on meeting people, sending out resumes and cover letters, and doing interviews. But I'm having a hard time figuring out how to bridge the gap in between those two areas - b/t the high level soul searching and the tactical aspects of job searching - the part where I find out what I want to do. So, I think it's good to set some mini-goals to help me along and keep me productive. Also, I think the process will not be in distinct and defined phases. Sometimes, I'll be meeting people and sending out applications, but I'll still concurrently be brainstorming new ideas. I'm sure as I meet more people, I'll discover new opportunities that I hadn't previously considered. It'll be a more fluid process by necessity.
I had the good fortune to reconnect recently with an old co-worker from my time in consulting. I told her I was looking for a new job. She forwarded me information about some new openings in city government which sound very interesting, so I plan to apply to these positions in the near future - hopefully in the next day or two.
On the SAHD front, this week is my first week being at home full-time on my own with my son without any help (as my mother-in-law returned home). It's been harder than I thought, but still so much better than investment banking. (I still have no regrets quitting my job.) My wife created a schedule for me to follow in terms of feeding and naps. At 9-mo old, my son requires constant attention. Now, he can crawl around places, so I can't leave him out of my sight, because he'll hit his head on the hardwood floor or try to climb onto things and reach for anything. Feedings are time consuming because he can't feed himself yet, so I have to sit there and feed him milk or cereal, etc. His naps are my free time to read or catch up on some TV.
So, I finally got around to reading Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua. I borrowed it from a friend and read it in 2 days. Overall, I thought it was really entertaining and definitely a memoir, not a how-to book. It made me think about how strict I will be as a parent and how much I will push my children. My parents were strict by stereotypical Western standards, but I thought pretty easy-going by stereotypical Asian standards. Academics were very important, but as long as I was getting As they didn't make me do extra stuff, like competitions. And I played instruments growing up, but I started relatively later than others and they allowed me to quit the instruments one-by-one as I got older. My parents were well-rounded people who were not excellent at any particular thing and I think they raised me to be the same. When I think about my son, I think "In order for him to really be excellent at something, I need to expose him to it really early, and he has to enjoy it, and I need to push him to continue even when he doesn't want to sometimes." And honestly, I haven't decided yet whether I want my son to have the chance to be excellent at something, or if it'd be fine for him to be generally well-rounded (like me). For him to be excellent at something, it has to not only be his dream and effort, but it probably requires my extreme effort and providing (money / time) as well. Hmm...
Anyway, next, I'm looking forward to reading Bringing Up Bebe, One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting. This book was also featured in the WSJ a few months ago. I really want a well-behaved child. Both my wife and I are stubborn people, so we need to focus on nurture where nature has failed. We already see signs of our sons stubbornness in his refusal to let us feed him with a spoon, and refusal to eat baby food. Any tips? We've tried holding his arms down and forcing it into his mouth, but that just made him cry a lot. We also tried deception, showing him water, then giving him food, but that too doesn't work for very long. We're trying patient encouragement now...
I'm enjoying the fact that I have time to do things like reading and running errands - something I wasn't able to do before because of my job. Right now my son is getting some rashes on his skin that come and go within an hour and we're systematically trying to figure out why. 2-3 times day, they appear and disappear, they look like large mosquito bites. (Regular Dr. appt scheduled for Monday). Is it something he's eating? Is it dust in our appt? Is it the carpet? Is it little bug bites? If this happened several months ago while I was working, I would tell my wife, "I'm busy, can you figure out what it is?" Now, it's my job to figure it out. So, now I'm conducting a mini-investigation, looking for clues. I'm taking this opportunity to really clean our place and shampoo the carpet. I think in the past, I was using my job as an excuse to be irresponsible in a lot of other areas of my life, but now I have no excuse. So being more disciplined in things like reading the Bible, cleaning, etc. And of course, still really happy to be watching live soccer in the afternoon. (Liverpool 4-1 Chelsea today).
I've turned into one of these guys above. I spent part of today strollering my son around the city, going to the bank, buying stuff at Bed Bath and Beyond. I probably look like one of these guys. I notice the other guys with strollers sans woman. No judging from me. I'm looking forward to watching this movie. Not in the theater, of course. Because I'm one of those guys above - no way to go to the movie theater. Will wait until it comes out on Apple TV.
I had the good fortune to reconnect recently with an old co-worker from my time in consulting. I told her I was looking for a new job. She forwarded me information about some new openings in city government which sound very interesting, so I plan to apply to these positions in the near future - hopefully in the next day or two.
On the SAHD front, this week is my first week being at home full-time on my own with my son without any help (as my mother-in-law returned home). It's been harder than I thought, but still so much better than investment banking. (I still have no regrets quitting my job.) My wife created a schedule for me to follow in terms of feeding and naps. At 9-mo old, my son requires constant attention. Now, he can crawl around places, so I can't leave him out of my sight, because he'll hit his head on the hardwood floor or try to climb onto things and reach for anything. Feedings are time consuming because he can't feed himself yet, so I have to sit there and feed him milk or cereal, etc. His naps are my free time to read or catch up on some TV.
So, I finally got around to reading Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother by Amy Chua. I borrowed it from a friend and read it in 2 days. Overall, I thought it was really entertaining and definitely a memoir, not a how-to book. It made me think about how strict I will be as a parent and how much I will push my children. My parents were strict by stereotypical Western standards, but I thought pretty easy-going by stereotypical Asian standards. Academics were very important, but as long as I was getting As they didn't make me do extra stuff, like competitions. And I played instruments growing up, but I started relatively later than others and they allowed me to quit the instruments one-by-one as I got older. My parents were well-rounded people who were not excellent at any particular thing and I think they raised me to be the same. When I think about my son, I think "In order for him to really be excellent at something, I need to expose him to it really early, and he has to enjoy it, and I need to push him to continue even when he doesn't want to sometimes." And honestly, I haven't decided yet whether I want my son to have the chance to be excellent at something, or if it'd be fine for him to be generally well-rounded (like me). For him to be excellent at something, it has to not only be his dream and effort, but it probably requires my extreme effort and providing (money / time) as well. Hmm...
Anyway, next, I'm looking forward to reading Bringing Up Bebe, One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting. This book was also featured in the WSJ a few months ago. I really want a well-behaved child. Both my wife and I are stubborn people, so we need to focus on nurture where nature has failed. We already see signs of our sons stubbornness in his refusal to let us feed him with a spoon, and refusal to eat baby food. Any tips? We've tried holding his arms down and forcing it into his mouth, but that just made him cry a lot. We also tried deception, showing him water, then giving him food, but that too doesn't work for very long. We're trying patient encouragement now...
I'm enjoying the fact that I have time to do things like reading and running errands - something I wasn't able to do before because of my job. Right now my son is getting some rashes on his skin that come and go within an hour and we're systematically trying to figure out why. 2-3 times day, they appear and disappear, they look like large mosquito bites. (Regular Dr. appt scheduled for Monday). Is it something he's eating? Is it dust in our appt? Is it the carpet? Is it little bug bites? If this happened several months ago while I was working, I would tell my wife, "I'm busy, can you figure out what it is?" Now, it's my job to figure it out. So, now I'm conducting a mini-investigation, looking for clues. I'm taking this opportunity to really clean our place and shampoo the carpet. I think in the past, I was using my job as an excuse to be irresponsible in a lot of other areas of my life, but now I have no excuse. So being more disciplined in things like reading the Bible, cleaning, etc. And of course, still really happy to be watching live soccer in the afternoon. (Liverpool 4-1 Chelsea today).
I've turned into one of these guys above. I spent part of today strollering my son around the city, going to the bank, buying stuff at Bed Bath and Beyond. I probably look like one of these guys. I notice the other guys with strollers sans woman. No judging from me. I'm looking forward to watching this movie. Not in the theater, of course. Because I'm one of those guys above - no way to go to the movie theater. Will wait until it comes out on Apple TV.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Responsibility and SAHDs
One of my good friends from Virginia, Paul Jeon, is a pastor of a new church plant. He has a blog and recently wrote a post on his framework for decision making as it pertains to job stuff. His framework builds off of Tim Keller's (Affinity, Ability, Opportunity) but includes two additional factors (Community and Responsibility).
You can read his post here:
http://pastorpauljeon.blogspot.com/2012/04/gods-will-for-my-life-part-deux.html
Keller implicitly mentions community when he talks about discerning abilities. But I liked how Paul explicitly mentions the role that community has in helping you make decisions. Also he explicitly mentions responsibility. I think this is a very reasonable and sometimes neglected factor, but also difficult to determine. When I was working in banking, I felt like I was somewhat neglecting my wife, my friends, and myself. Quitting my job genuinely felt like a responsible thing to do, even though on the face of it, it could appear like a selfish thing to do. Now the pendulum has swung the other way. Now, with me not working - the responsible thing to do would be to find a job, sooner rather than later. But a responsible thing to do could be also to make the best use of this time to not make a hasty decision also. May God examine my heart.
Responsibility is an interesting thing because it can be interpreted in many ways and the outcomes will be different for different people. More on this another time...
Sidebar: I am not seriously considering being a stay-at-home dad for a long time, but I am becoming a stay-at-home dad by default at the moment because my wife is working. Proponents for stay-at-home parenting would argue that a responsible thing to do would be to stay at home and nurture your child. Or, if appropriate, others would argue that the responsible thing to do is for both parents to work to provide for your family. I've had a lot of random thoughts about gender roles in the past few months - some I've shared with my wife. It's interesting that as a man, I feel a responsibility to "bring home the bacon", but I don't feel a strong responsibility to be a stay-at-home dad, though certainly I have a responsibility to be a good father. Similarly, some women may feel conflicted about going back to work because they feel a responsibility to stay at home and may feel that is an important part of being a good mother, and they have to deal with a sense of guilt of going back to work - a guilt that I, as a man, do not feel even for a second.
Sidebar continued: Albeit for a temporary time, I'm going to be a SAHD (Stay-at-home-dad). I never sought this out - it just sort of happened. It's interesting because I'm sure there's this whole culture of SAHDs that I know nothing about. I'm somewhat curious to learn about other SAHDs. Who are they? Why? Are they mostly like me? Was it a financial decision - she makes more than I do. Was it a role decision - I like being at home more than she does. Combination of a variety of factors? If stay-at-home mom's go out on lunch dates and walks in the park, I wonder what the male equivalent of that is. I think it'd be really really awesome (not really) if I could find some sub-culture of SAHDs that just watches and plays sports all the time. Like imagine if 5-6 guys and their kids all met up yesterday afternoon to watch Man City vs. Man United. (Actually, that's exactly what I did - watched it with my son this afternoon along with hundreds of millions of others around the world while Americans were at work). I assume that SAHD's feel like they need to preserve/assert a sense of masculinity, particularly because they are performing a traditionally female role. Perhaps more on this topic another time...
You can read his post here:
http://pastorpauljeon.blogspot.com/2012/04/gods-will-for-my-life-part-deux.html
Keller implicitly mentions community when he talks about discerning abilities. But I liked how Paul explicitly mentions the role that community has in helping you make decisions. Also he explicitly mentions responsibility. I think this is a very reasonable and sometimes neglected factor, but also difficult to determine. When I was working in banking, I felt like I was somewhat neglecting my wife, my friends, and myself. Quitting my job genuinely felt like a responsible thing to do, even though on the face of it, it could appear like a selfish thing to do. Now the pendulum has swung the other way. Now, with me not working - the responsible thing to do would be to find a job, sooner rather than later. But a responsible thing to do could be also to make the best use of this time to not make a hasty decision also. May God examine my heart.
Responsibility is an interesting thing because it can be interpreted in many ways and the outcomes will be different for different people. More on this another time...
Sidebar: I am not seriously considering being a stay-at-home dad for a long time, but I am becoming a stay-at-home dad by default at the moment because my wife is working. Proponents for stay-at-home parenting would argue that a responsible thing to do would be to stay at home and nurture your child. Or, if appropriate, others would argue that the responsible thing to do is for both parents to work to provide for your family. I've had a lot of random thoughts about gender roles in the past few months - some I've shared with my wife. It's interesting that as a man, I feel a responsibility to "bring home the bacon", but I don't feel a strong responsibility to be a stay-at-home dad, though certainly I have a responsibility to be a good father. Similarly, some women may feel conflicted about going back to work because they feel a responsibility to stay at home and may feel that is an important part of being a good mother, and they have to deal with a sense of guilt of going back to work - a guilt that I, as a man, do not feel even for a second.
Sidebar continued: Albeit for a temporary time, I'm going to be a SAHD (Stay-at-home-dad). I never sought this out - it just sort of happened. It's interesting because I'm sure there's this whole culture of SAHDs that I know nothing about. I'm somewhat curious to learn about other SAHDs. Who are they? Why? Are they mostly like me? Was it a financial decision - she makes more than I do. Was it a role decision - I like being at home more than she does. Combination of a variety of factors? If stay-at-home mom's go out on lunch dates and walks in the park, I wonder what the male equivalent of that is. I think it'd be really really awesome (not really) if I could find some sub-culture of SAHDs that just watches and plays sports all the time. Like imagine if 5-6 guys and their kids all met up yesterday afternoon to watch Man City vs. Man United. (Actually, that's exactly what I did - watched it with my son this afternoon along with hundreds of millions of others around the world while Americans were at work). I assume that SAHD's feel like they need to preserve/assert a sense of masculinity, particularly because they are performing a traditionally female role. Perhaps more on this topic another time...
Monday, April 23, 2012
Restarting the Blog
I got a little lazy and haven't posted anything in over a month. This is partly due to significant travel and family commitments in recent weeks. But also, I think I hit a mini-wall. A few things:
1. I'm back now from my long trip(s), so now it's just me and my brainstorming sessions. Time to keep the ball rolling and stay productive.
2. I can see how easy it could be for me to just stay unemployed for a long time, like months or years. Two months just flew by. That's a little scary. I want to strike a good balance of staying methodical and deliberate with my job search but still making daily / weekly progress.
3. I think I'm putting too much pressure on myself to write something deep and thoughtful. I think I need to focus more on keeping the process going. I should try to post more frequently, even if it's a short posts, or even if it's short spurts of thoughts like this post. I need to stay focused on the goal here, which is to find a job, not write nice blog posts.
4. A friend who also went through a time of unemployment gave me good advice which I plan to take to heart. It's really easy to get stuck in the house - watch TV, take a nap, surf the web, etc. So, my plan is to go to the library every week day for several hours. The change in environment, hopefully, will be good for me. Hence, I'm writing this post from a public library.
5. I have a child and staying at home and taking care of a child is actually really tiring - it's mentally and physically challenging. I've only been alone with my child for 2-4 hours at a time so far, but soon, when my wife starts working, it'll be 8-10 hours at a time, maybe more. I'm developing a deeper respect for stay-at-home moms and dads. Our current plan is to put our child in daycare for 3 days a week starting in June, so that I have time to meet people, do interviews, etc. when that time comes.
6. I think one of the important next steps are to begin just talking to people and learning about what they do and how they got into it. I need to reach out to my network of friends and colleagues from school, church, previous jobs, family, friends, etc. One future activity is to create a list of people I want to talk to. Networking sites like LinkedIn and Facebook should help here.
7. A friend forwarded me this HBS blog article:
To Find Happiness, Forget about Passion http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2012/01/to_find_happiness_forget_about.html
Given my last post, I thought it was a good reminder not to be too focused on being inward looking, but to look out into the world and consider the problems you want to solve in your life. I think that'll help as I brainstorm.
8. On a slightly related topic, I'm also hoping to get in better shape during my time off - exercising regularly. First, just for the pure physical benefit of being healthy, energized, and feeling good, but also for the mental / emotional benefit of keeping a routine, being disciplined, etc. I hope this will lead to me eating healthier as well. Again - contributing to me being disciplined and regimented.
1. I'm back now from my long trip(s), so now it's just me and my brainstorming sessions. Time to keep the ball rolling and stay productive.
2. I can see how easy it could be for me to just stay unemployed for a long time, like months or years. Two months just flew by. That's a little scary. I want to strike a good balance of staying methodical and deliberate with my job search but still making daily / weekly progress.
3. I think I'm putting too much pressure on myself to write something deep and thoughtful. I think I need to focus more on keeping the process going. I should try to post more frequently, even if it's a short posts, or even if it's short spurts of thoughts like this post. I need to stay focused on the goal here, which is to find a job, not write nice blog posts.
4. A friend who also went through a time of unemployment gave me good advice which I plan to take to heart. It's really easy to get stuck in the house - watch TV, take a nap, surf the web, etc. So, my plan is to go to the library every week day for several hours. The change in environment, hopefully, will be good for me. Hence, I'm writing this post from a public library.
5. I have a child and staying at home and taking care of a child is actually really tiring - it's mentally and physically challenging. I've only been alone with my child for 2-4 hours at a time so far, but soon, when my wife starts working, it'll be 8-10 hours at a time, maybe more. I'm developing a deeper respect for stay-at-home moms and dads. Our current plan is to put our child in daycare for 3 days a week starting in June, so that I have time to meet people, do interviews, etc. when that time comes.
6. I think one of the important next steps are to begin just talking to people and learning about what they do and how they got into it. I need to reach out to my network of friends and colleagues from school, church, previous jobs, family, friends, etc. One future activity is to create a list of people I want to talk to. Networking sites like LinkedIn and Facebook should help here.
7. A friend forwarded me this HBS blog article:
To Find Happiness, Forget about Passion http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2012/01/to_find_happiness_forget_about.html
Given my last post, I thought it was a good reminder not to be too focused on being inward looking, but to look out into the world and consider the problems you want to solve in your life. I think that'll help as I brainstorm.
8. On a slightly related topic, I'm also hoping to get in better shape during my time off - exercising regularly. First, just for the pure physical benefit of being healthy, energized, and feeling good, but also for the mental / emotional benefit of keeping a routine, being disciplined, etc. I hope this will lead to me eating healthier as well. Again - contributing to me being disciplined and regimented.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Finding Your Passion
Several times over the past year, whenever I’ve discussed my dissatisfaction in my current job and my desire to do something else but not sure what, I’ve been asked what I’m really passionate about. And I’ve always been honest and straightforward and said “I’m not sure.” Or “I’m trying to figure that out.” I’m still in this stage.
I think the most basic and common career advice I often hear is to follow your passion. But this isn't helpful when I don’t even know what my passion is. I’m not sure if this is a personal problem, a life stage problem, a generational problem, or some mix of all these and others. I recently mentioned to someone here, half-jokingly, that I was going through my quarter-life crisis. That made me think of the book by Alexandra Robbins, Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in Your Twenties. I quickly skimmed through a free chapter from Amazon and realized this book wasn’t going to be helpful for me, because it just discusses what it is, not exactly what to do about it. But then, I saw that she wrote a second book a few years later called Conquering Your Quarterlife Crisis. Unfortunately, the tagline is: Advice from Twentysomethings Who Have Been There and Survived. I quickly skimmed through the free chapter and put this book down as well. Why am I going to read a book written by a bunch of 20-somethings trying to justify their own decisions made a couple years ago? I want to read a book written by 60-somethings looking back with ample perspective on the decisions they made when they were in their 20’s and 30’s.
So, how do I find out what I’m passionate about? I remembered the power of the internet, so I literally googled “finding your passion” to see what this would yield. There’s a lot of self-help gurus each with their own advice. Similar to my earlier approach, it’s probably not wise to just follow the advice of one and run with it. But I thought I’d read over several of them to see if there are some common themes and frameworks.
One video I found helpful was by a Stanford professor named Randy Komisar, who’s also had a crazy successful career (CEO of LucasArts, Senior Counsel to Apple Computer, founding director of TiVO, etc.). In this short clip, he talks about not getting paralyzed looking for one singular passion, but instead thinking about a portfolio of passions and constantly moving in the right direction.
http://academicearth.org/lectures/how-do-you-find-your-passion-and-pursue-it
(BTW, Academic Earth is like a YouTube for free online lectures of a certain quality)
While reading a bunch of other stuff on the web, I think some of the common themes were:
1. Brainstorm what I like to do for fun and consider if there’s a way to make money off of it. Cast a wide net of anything and everything. Childhood dreams, hobbies, interests, etc.
2. Solicit feedback from others for ideas or what I seem to be passionate about. Friends / career counseling / mentors, etc.
3. Don’t be afraid to try something out / don’t be afraid of failure / don’t be afraid of going in the wrong direction. Try an internship, try a PT job, etc.
4. Constantly talk to others about what they do to help brainstorm ideas for yourself.
I also found this list a couple of times. Don’t know who to attribute it to, but found these questions helpful as well.
What puts a smile on your face?
What do you find easy?
What sparks your creativity?
What would you do for free?
What do you like to talk about?
What makes you unafraid of failure?
What would you regret not having tried?
So, a few days ago, I started an exercise in jotting down anything and everything I like. This is a work in progress and in no particular order. Some of these are topics, some of these are processes. I think I’ll continue to look through this list to see if there are some themes and ideas that emerge:
Things I am passionate about (no particular order):
1. Soccer – the game itself
2. Learning about obscure sports (cycling, cricket, curling, etc.) – I like learning about why something is so popular with a certain segment of society. I like learning about the intricacies and strategies of something that initially looks so simple.
3. Information proliferation – I like sharing info with others whether it be good advice, a good deal, interesting news, a good idea, etc.
4. Reforming the church – I think it really bothers me when the Church is doing something poorly. (Bashing gays, prosperity gospel, hoarding resources, insulated culture, etc.)
5. Making an idea into reality – I’m not a creative guy, but I’m an implementer. I need to partner with someone who has a good idea and I can make it happen. It bothers me when good ideas go to waste.
6. Process improvement – I like making things more efficient, simpler. It bothers me when time or resources is unnecessarily wasted.
7. Summarizing the point – I like getting to the main point quickly. (I used to summarize news for my job. I like facilitating disagreements and getting to a point of consensus.)
8. Behavioral finance – I like learning about how we make bad, irrational decisions and want to help others make better decisions, combating over-confidence, relying on statistical evidence over emotions.
9. Puzzles – I like completing a defined task. I like finding patterns. I can do puzzles pretty quickly. (This is similar to my previous comment of “any monkey can do it”. It’s true that any monkey can finish a puzzle. But I have the ability to just sit there and continually find patterns and not get bored or tired.)
10. Building things (legos, Ikea furniture) – I like following directions and building what it’s intended to be.
11. Blogging / web site management (I created a personal web site in high school, in college, had an active xanga site post-college, and now have LINcredibles) – In all these instances, it wasn’t a self-focused web site. It was focused on other topics. I think I like sharing information / ideas and being helpful.
12. Some kind of resolution to the problem of North Korea – I generally read up on major news regarding North Korea.
13. Jeremy Lin – I think he’s the first real Asian-American, Christian celebrity and the celebrity that is most similar to me and my values. I think he has a great opportunity to spread the gospel and be an example, particularly in Asia.
14. Lady Gaga – I’m actually not passionate about her. But I like her “apparent” authenticity and anti-bullying message. I think she’s smart and talented. When I start learning about someone, I get obsessed and read Wikipedia and watch youtube videos. I’ve seen Lady Gaga’s GoogleTalk, her 60 Minutes interview w/ Anderson Cooper, and watched her HBO special, etc.
14a. When I get obsessed over a topic, I google it to the ground. I love researching topics on the internet.
15. Kim Yuna – Koreans excelling in the world makes me happy.
16. LPGA – Koreans excelling in the world makes me happy.
17. Korean national soccer team – B/c I’m ethnically Korean and I love soccer.
18. Social justice as an idea, not as a ministry opportunity – I say this honestly. I did inner-city tutoring / mentoring for 3 years and through the experience, I realized that’s not where my gifts are. However, I remain passionate about the goals and mission.
19. Education reform – I’m no expert, but I like reading about these issues because of my passion for: education, social justice, and b/c I’m a problem solver and hate seeing a problem persist.
20. Helping the common man – as a theme.
21. Want to be around people like me: faith, personality, character, etc. – I’m not happy about this, but I think I find it much more difficult than others in reaching out and connecting with people that are different from me in a social setting.
22. Moneyball – I like nerds infiltrating all areas of life and making things better. (similar to behavioral finance)
23. Anti-lotteries – I hate lotteries. It is a tax on the poor and stupid. The very opposite of what a progressive society aims to do. Anti-Robin Hood. It steals from the poor and gives all the money to one suddenly very rich person. (I even wrote a final paper in business school on this topic).
24. Personal philanthropy – wanting to see a just society, but I have unresolved issues with the non-profit sector as a whole because I don’t know what does more harm than good.
25. China – It’s the rising superpower and I think it’s really interesting to see how a centralized government handles a rising middle class and a growing Christian population.
26. Arab Spring – freedom from oppression. I love reading about what’s happened this past year. I think it’s short-term instability for potential long-term benefit.
27. Don’t want to “play defense” in my job – by this, I mean a job that is essentially waiting for something bad to happen (counterterrorism analyst, but also fireman, policeman, etc.) I felt it was depressing and most of the time, you’re sitting there doing nothing. I think I’d be happier actively doing something positive, rather than trying to prevent something negative.
28. Redeemer – I love Tim Keller. I love what Redeemer does.
29. Satisfier, not maximizer – I like making quick decisions and moving on. I like relying on experts who know more than me.
30. Index funds – they outperform mutual funds and cost less. The mutual fund industry as a whole takes money away from average people – that’s wrong.
31. Asian-Americans issues – I read Angry Asian Man blog regularly.
32. Posting cool articles to Facebook – like sharing information
33. Advances in technology – I’m not a techie, but I’m fascinated by how our world is changing so rapidly and I embrace it. I love the fact that I can FaceTime with my parents and in-laws across the world for free.
34. Reading news – I read NYTimes, WashPost, Huffington Post, Gothamist, Atlantic, NewYorker, ESPN, Soccernet, and a few others daily – I like being aware of what’s going on.
Anyway, this is the list I have going so far. I’m going to continue adding to this and trying to develop ideas and themes. Please feel free to:
1. Share with me any good advice you’ve received on identifying your passions.
2. Share with me any themes or ideas you’ve noticed or think I should consider more deeply.
I think the most basic and common career advice I often hear is to follow your passion. But this isn't helpful when I don’t even know what my passion is. I’m not sure if this is a personal problem, a life stage problem, a generational problem, or some mix of all these and others. I recently mentioned to someone here, half-jokingly, that I was going through my quarter-life crisis. That made me think of the book by Alexandra Robbins, Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in Your Twenties. I quickly skimmed through a free chapter from Amazon and realized this book wasn’t going to be helpful for me, because it just discusses what it is, not exactly what to do about it. But then, I saw that she wrote a second book a few years later called Conquering Your Quarterlife Crisis. Unfortunately, the tagline is: Advice from Twentysomethings Who Have Been There and Survived. I quickly skimmed through the free chapter and put this book down as well. Why am I going to read a book written by a bunch of 20-somethings trying to justify their own decisions made a couple years ago? I want to read a book written by 60-somethings looking back with ample perspective on the decisions they made when they were in their 20’s and 30’s.
So, how do I find out what I’m passionate about? I remembered the power of the internet, so I literally googled “finding your passion” to see what this would yield. There’s a lot of self-help gurus each with their own advice. Similar to my earlier approach, it’s probably not wise to just follow the advice of one and run with it. But I thought I’d read over several of them to see if there are some common themes and frameworks.
One video I found helpful was by a Stanford professor named Randy Komisar, who’s also had a crazy successful career (CEO of LucasArts, Senior Counsel to Apple Computer, founding director of TiVO, etc.). In this short clip, he talks about not getting paralyzed looking for one singular passion, but instead thinking about a portfolio of passions and constantly moving in the right direction.
http://academicearth.org/lectures/how-do-you-find-your-passion-and-pursue-it
(BTW, Academic Earth is like a YouTube for free online lectures of a certain quality)
While reading a bunch of other stuff on the web, I think some of the common themes were:
1. Brainstorm what I like to do for fun and consider if there’s a way to make money off of it. Cast a wide net of anything and everything. Childhood dreams, hobbies, interests, etc.
2. Solicit feedback from others for ideas or what I seem to be passionate about. Friends / career counseling / mentors, etc.
3. Don’t be afraid to try something out / don’t be afraid of failure / don’t be afraid of going in the wrong direction. Try an internship, try a PT job, etc.
4. Constantly talk to others about what they do to help brainstorm ideas for yourself.
I also found this list a couple of times. Don’t know who to attribute it to, but found these questions helpful as well.
What puts a smile on your face?
What do you find easy?
What sparks your creativity?
What would you do for free?
What do you like to talk about?
What makes you unafraid of failure?
What would you regret not having tried?
So, a few days ago, I started an exercise in jotting down anything and everything I like. This is a work in progress and in no particular order. Some of these are topics, some of these are processes. I think I’ll continue to look through this list to see if there are some themes and ideas that emerge:
Things I am passionate about (no particular order):
1. Soccer – the game itself
2. Learning about obscure sports (cycling, cricket, curling, etc.) – I like learning about why something is so popular with a certain segment of society. I like learning about the intricacies and strategies of something that initially looks so simple.
3. Information proliferation – I like sharing info with others whether it be good advice, a good deal, interesting news, a good idea, etc.
4. Reforming the church – I think it really bothers me when the Church is doing something poorly. (Bashing gays, prosperity gospel, hoarding resources, insulated culture, etc.)
5. Making an idea into reality – I’m not a creative guy, but I’m an implementer. I need to partner with someone who has a good idea and I can make it happen. It bothers me when good ideas go to waste.
6. Process improvement – I like making things more efficient, simpler. It bothers me when time or resources is unnecessarily wasted.
7. Summarizing the point – I like getting to the main point quickly. (I used to summarize news for my job. I like facilitating disagreements and getting to a point of consensus.)
8. Behavioral finance – I like learning about how we make bad, irrational decisions and want to help others make better decisions, combating over-confidence, relying on statistical evidence over emotions.
9. Puzzles – I like completing a defined task. I like finding patterns. I can do puzzles pretty quickly. (This is similar to my previous comment of “any monkey can do it”. It’s true that any monkey can finish a puzzle. But I have the ability to just sit there and continually find patterns and not get bored or tired.)
10. Building things (legos, Ikea furniture) – I like following directions and building what it’s intended to be.
11. Blogging / web site management (I created a personal web site in high school, in college, had an active xanga site post-college, and now have LINcredibles) – In all these instances, it wasn’t a self-focused web site. It was focused on other topics. I think I like sharing information / ideas and being helpful.
12. Some kind of resolution to the problem of North Korea – I generally read up on major news regarding North Korea.
13. Jeremy Lin – I think he’s the first real Asian-American, Christian celebrity and the celebrity that is most similar to me and my values. I think he has a great opportunity to spread the gospel and be an example, particularly in Asia.
14. Lady Gaga – I’m actually not passionate about her. But I like her “apparent” authenticity and anti-bullying message. I think she’s smart and talented. When I start learning about someone, I get obsessed and read Wikipedia and watch youtube videos. I’ve seen Lady Gaga’s GoogleTalk, her 60 Minutes interview w/ Anderson Cooper, and watched her HBO special, etc.
14a. When I get obsessed over a topic, I google it to the ground. I love researching topics on the internet.
15. Kim Yuna – Koreans excelling in the world makes me happy.
16. LPGA – Koreans excelling in the world makes me happy.
17. Korean national soccer team – B/c I’m ethnically Korean and I love soccer.
18. Social justice as an idea, not as a ministry opportunity – I say this honestly. I did inner-city tutoring / mentoring for 3 years and through the experience, I realized that’s not where my gifts are. However, I remain passionate about the goals and mission.
19. Education reform – I’m no expert, but I like reading about these issues because of my passion for: education, social justice, and b/c I’m a problem solver and hate seeing a problem persist.
20. Helping the common man – as a theme.
21. Want to be around people like me: faith, personality, character, etc. – I’m not happy about this, but I think I find it much more difficult than others in reaching out and connecting with people that are different from me in a social setting.
22. Moneyball – I like nerds infiltrating all areas of life and making things better. (similar to behavioral finance)
23. Anti-lotteries – I hate lotteries. It is a tax on the poor and stupid. The very opposite of what a progressive society aims to do. Anti-Robin Hood. It steals from the poor and gives all the money to one suddenly very rich person. (I even wrote a final paper in business school on this topic).
24. Personal philanthropy – wanting to see a just society, but I have unresolved issues with the non-profit sector as a whole because I don’t know what does more harm than good.
25. China – It’s the rising superpower and I think it’s really interesting to see how a centralized government handles a rising middle class and a growing Christian population.
26. Arab Spring – freedom from oppression. I love reading about what’s happened this past year. I think it’s short-term instability for potential long-term benefit.
27. Don’t want to “play defense” in my job – by this, I mean a job that is essentially waiting for something bad to happen (counterterrorism analyst, but also fireman, policeman, etc.) I felt it was depressing and most of the time, you’re sitting there doing nothing. I think I’d be happier actively doing something positive, rather than trying to prevent something negative.
28. Redeemer – I love Tim Keller. I love what Redeemer does.
29. Satisfier, not maximizer – I like making quick decisions and moving on. I like relying on experts who know more than me.
30. Index funds – they outperform mutual funds and cost less. The mutual fund industry as a whole takes money away from average people – that’s wrong.
31. Asian-Americans issues – I read Angry Asian Man blog regularly.
32. Posting cool articles to Facebook – like sharing information
33. Advances in technology – I’m not a techie, but I’m fascinated by how our world is changing so rapidly and I embrace it. I love the fact that I can FaceTime with my parents and in-laws across the world for free.
34. Reading news – I read NYTimes, WashPost, Huffington Post, Gothamist, Atlantic, NewYorker, ESPN, Soccernet, and a few others daily – I like being aware of what’s going on.
Anyway, this is the list I have going so far. I’m going to continue adding to this and trying to develop ideas and themes. Please feel free to:
1. Share with me any good advice you’ve received on identifying your passions.
2. Share with me any themes or ideas you’ve noticed or think I should consider more deeply.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
The Element
Two thoughts before I begin. First, I’ve been finding it very helpful to read books to help me brainstorm and process thoughts. Over the past year, I found it difficult to “soul search” just sitting at home. It’s hard to just sit and think about what I want to do with my life. Reading books provides some material to react to. Second, talking and e-mailing with others has been helpful as well. There’s a chapter in The Element that talks about the importance of mentors. Tim Keller talks about the importance of receiving feedback from others to validate your strengths as you think about what your abilities are (so you are not self-deluded.) Also, hearing about what other people do and how they got to where they are provide some templates for me to consider.
Tonight, the Lai family had dinner with a man who is in the food industry. He only has a high school degree, but worked his way up through Coles (Australian supermarket chain) the first 10 years of working, then started his own business being a food distributor to Coles and other supermarkets in Australia. He eventually sold his business for a nice profit and now runs restaurants among other things. His passion is food and he’s living it out in his work. As I was opening up to him about how I quit banking and am taking time off to find out what I want to do next, his first question to me was “What are you passionate about?” And, while I still don’t have a clear answer to that, I knew I was talking to someone who had a good perspective on life and had thought to ask some right questions in his own life. It’s a good reminder for me to keep on talking to others and hearing their stories and learning from them.
A couple days ago, I skimmed through the Element in about one hour. The book has one central message (the importance of finding your element), then each chapter discusses different aspects of that central theme. The book is littered with dozens of mini-stories of famous people who have found their element and serve as examples to illustrate some of the topics of each chapter. The reason I skimmed the book so quickly was because the book was a bit disjointed and I didn’t find a lot of the examples helpful. Later, I read some comments on Amazon and others had similar feedback about the book. It’s interesting and may be inspiring to some to read about how Meg Ryan, Matt Groening, or Paul McCartney found their element. But for most of us, we’re not super-excellent in a particular thing, and for me in particular, I’m not skilled in acting, drawing, or singing. The book was impressive in how the author got a lot of high profile individuals to interview for the book. But, in the end, that’s most of what it seemed to be: a collection of high profile interviews. Still, while the book was not helpful in teaching me something new, I think it was helpful in validating my current quest – that it is a worthwhile endeavor. And some of the chapters were good reminders and an encouragement to me.
[Aside: Apparently, Ken Robinson had a decently inspiring TED talk (which I listened to briefly) in which he talks about how our education system doesn’t sufficiently allow for more creativity to flourish. I think this idea is what he’s famous for and he talks about this a lot in his book. I think his book, then, is less about how to find your passion, but more about the importance of finding your passion.]
When Robinson talks about “the element”, he’s talking about the point where natural aptitude and personal passion meet. Then he talks about two conditions for getting it: attitude and opportunity. (This is remarkably similar to Tim Keller’s affinity, ability, opportunity framework. There must be some age-old truth to this stuff.) Robinson’s framework then is this: “I get it, I love it, I want it, Where is it?” (Aptitude, Passion, Attitude, Opportunity).
I skimmed quickly through some of his earlier chapters about how there’s different types of intelligence, how creativity and imagination is important, how when we’re in our element we’re “in the zone”. A lot of this stuff was too theoretical. The next chapter was about the importance of finding others who have the same passion – “finding your tribe.” I think this is an important point, but not helpful at my particular juncture.
Chapter 6: What Will They Think? was interesting. It was a good discussion about the legitimate challenges we face in pursuing our passions. These challenges are personal, social, and cultural. I think this is a topic for a separate blog, but quickly, I think this is a major hurdle for me and others to finding and pursuing our passion. There are expectations that we ourselves and others place on us. We need a certain type of job, or certain type of life, certain salary, certain status, etc. When I think about my background, all the decisions up to this point were easy because my interests were aligned with others’ interests and society’s expectations. Going to college – I wanted to go, and parents were happy I got in, prestigious school. Working as an intelligence analyst – only job offer I had at graduation, parents happy I have a job during economic downturn. Moving to consulting – I wanted to switch to something more dynamic, job pays better, more prestigious job, opens doors to future. Going to business school – I wanted to get the degree, but also gives me potential for higher salary and better job in the future. Banking – great job in a difficult economic environment, very prestigious, excellent salary, etc. I think the tough part of this next step is that I’m making a decision that will, at least in the short run and potentially in the long run, be less lucrative and less prestigious and filled with more uncertainty. This is why it’s been so difficult for me, my wife, my parents, and others.
In this part of the book, among other examples, Robinson talks about how Paul Coelho’s parents sent him to a psychiatric institution to get electroshock therapy because he wanted to be a writer, which they believed, would be a waste of his life, and not a lawyer as they wanted him to be. Examples like this are cute and good because we know eventually he becomes a great writer. I think the difficulty though is pursuing your passion in the face of uncertainty and knowing that for most of us, we will not reach his level of success. Pursuing your passion would be a lot easier if we knew “it works out in the end” and I become rich or famous. But it’s difficult when we almost know for sure (perhaps not?) that “it won’t work out in the end” by certain metrics. And how we define success, and perhaps how I personally define success, is a good topic to dig deeper into soon.
[Thinking back now, I realize this is the deep disconnect in Robinson’s book. All his examples are people who found their element and reached some level of worldly success. I think the subliminal message (intended or not) in his book is that if you pursue your passion, things will work out in the end and you, too, will reach some level of worldly success. But the reality is that for most of us, we will not be the next Richard Branson, Monica Seles, Ridley Scott, or Aaron Sorkin. We need to give up some level or type of worldly success (at least temporarily, if not permanently) to pursue our passion.]
[Thinking back now, this is a second disconnect of Robinson’s book. Most of his examples are of people who have some extraordinary talent that average normal people can’t possibly achieve. Most of us are average people with a few above-average talents, but nothing extraordinary. (It’s somewhat demoralizing to have Monica Seles as an example in a book!) For most of us, our goal is to find our passion, combine it with our above-average talent, and do something reasonably productive with our lives. Not win multiple Grand Slams.]
Later chapters discuss the importance of mentors (already mentioned), the fact that it’s never too late to change directions, the tension between love and money, and how we can change our education system to help more people find their element.
I think I have some more good food for thought for the weeks ahead as I continue my journey.
Tonight, the Lai family had dinner with a man who is in the food industry. He only has a high school degree, but worked his way up through Coles (Australian supermarket chain) the first 10 years of working, then started his own business being a food distributor to Coles and other supermarkets in Australia. He eventually sold his business for a nice profit and now runs restaurants among other things. His passion is food and he’s living it out in his work. As I was opening up to him about how I quit banking and am taking time off to find out what I want to do next, his first question to me was “What are you passionate about?” And, while I still don’t have a clear answer to that, I knew I was talking to someone who had a good perspective on life and had thought to ask some right questions in his own life. It’s a good reminder for me to keep on talking to others and hearing their stories and learning from them.
A couple days ago, I skimmed through the Element in about one hour. The book has one central message (the importance of finding your element), then each chapter discusses different aspects of that central theme. The book is littered with dozens of mini-stories of famous people who have found their element and serve as examples to illustrate some of the topics of each chapter. The reason I skimmed the book so quickly was because the book was a bit disjointed and I didn’t find a lot of the examples helpful. Later, I read some comments on Amazon and others had similar feedback about the book. It’s interesting and may be inspiring to some to read about how Meg Ryan, Matt Groening, or Paul McCartney found their element. But for most of us, we’re not super-excellent in a particular thing, and for me in particular, I’m not skilled in acting, drawing, or singing. The book was impressive in how the author got a lot of high profile individuals to interview for the book. But, in the end, that’s most of what it seemed to be: a collection of high profile interviews. Still, while the book was not helpful in teaching me something new, I think it was helpful in validating my current quest – that it is a worthwhile endeavor. And some of the chapters were good reminders and an encouragement to me.
[Aside: Apparently, Ken Robinson had a decently inspiring TED talk (which I listened to briefly) in which he talks about how our education system doesn’t sufficiently allow for more creativity to flourish. I think this idea is what he’s famous for and he talks about this a lot in his book. I think his book, then, is less about how to find your passion, but more about the importance of finding your passion.]
When Robinson talks about “the element”, he’s talking about the point where natural aptitude and personal passion meet. Then he talks about two conditions for getting it: attitude and opportunity. (This is remarkably similar to Tim Keller’s affinity, ability, opportunity framework. There must be some age-old truth to this stuff.) Robinson’s framework then is this: “I get it, I love it, I want it, Where is it?” (Aptitude, Passion, Attitude, Opportunity).
I skimmed quickly through some of his earlier chapters about how there’s different types of intelligence, how creativity and imagination is important, how when we’re in our element we’re “in the zone”. A lot of this stuff was too theoretical. The next chapter was about the importance of finding others who have the same passion – “finding your tribe.” I think this is an important point, but not helpful at my particular juncture.
Chapter 6: What Will They Think? was interesting. It was a good discussion about the legitimate challenges we face in pursuing our passions. These challenges are personal, social, and cultural. I think this is a topic for a separate blog, but quickly, I think this is a major hurdle for me and others to finding and pursuing our passion. There are expectations that we ourselves and others place on us. We need a certain type of job, or certain type of life, certain salary, certain status, etc. When I think about my background, all the decisions up to this point were easy because my interests were aligned with others’ interests and society’s expectations. Going to college – I wanted to go, and parents were happy I got in, prestigious school. Working as an intelligence analyst – only job offer I had at graduation, parents happy I have a job during economic downturn. Moving to consulting – I wanted to switch to something more dynamic, job pays better, more prestigious job, opens doors to future. Going to business school – I wanted to get the degree, but also gives me potential for higher salary and better job in the future. Banking – great job in a difficult economic environment, very prestigious, excellent salary, etc. I think the tough part of this next step is that I’m making a decision that will, at least in the short run and potentially in the long run, be less lucrative and less prestigious and filled with more uncertainty. This is why it’s been so difficult for me, my wife, my parents, and others.
In this part of the book, among other examples, Robinson talks about how Paul Coelho’s parents sent him to a psychiatric institution to get electroshock therapy because he wanted to be a writer, which they believed, would be a waste of his life, and not a lawyer as they wanted him to be. Examples like this are cute and good because we know eventually he becomes a great writer. I think the difficulty though is pursuing your passion in the face of uncertainty and knowing that for most of us, we will not reach his level of success. Pursuing your passion would be a lot easier if we knew “it works out in the end” and I become rich or famous. But it’s difficult when we almost know for sure (perhaps not?) that “it won’t work out in the end” by certain metrics. And how we define success, and perhaps how I personally define success, is a good topic to dig deeper into soon.
[Thinking back now, I realize this is the deep disconnect in Robinson’s book. All his examples are people who found their element and reached some level of worldly success. I think the subliminal message (intended or not) in his book is that if you pursue your passion, things will work out in the end and you, too, will reach some level of worldly success. But the reality is that for most of us, we will not be the next Richard Branson, Monica Seles, Ridley Scott, or Aaron Sorkin. We need to give up some level or type of worldly success (at least temporarily, if not permanently) to pursue our passion.]
[Thinking back now, this is a second disconnect of Robinson’s book. Most of his examples are of people who have some extraordinary talent that average normal people can’t possibly achieve. Most of us are average people with a few above-average talents, but nothing extraordinary. (It’s somewhat demoralizing to have Monica Seles as an example in a book!) For most of us, our goal is to find our passion, combine it with our above-average talent, and do something reasonably productive with our lives. Not win multiple Grand Slams.]
Later chapters discuss the importance of mentors (already mentioned), the fact that it’s never too late to change directions, the tension between love and money, and how we can change our education system to help more people find their element.
I think I have some more good food for thought for the weeks ahead as I continue my journey.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Strengths Finder: Part II
So I finished skimming the Strengths Finder book. The premise of the book is that we spend too much time focusing on our weaknesses and not enough time focusing on our strengths. Of course, at some minimal level, people need to focus on weaknesses. But after that, it’s more important to happiness and success to focus on our strengths. This resonates with me, because after doing banking where I felt like a fish out of water, I want to find something where I feel like I am thriving, where things come a bit more naturally to me because I’m good at it and it’s more fun to me.
Most of the book, then, goes into an explanation of each of the 34 strengths and providing some next steps. The book is careful about not being overly-prescriptive (Since this is your strength, you should pursue this career.) The book seems to focus on steps to address your strengths either in your job or outside your job. However, there are some action items that say stuff like “seek roles that do x, or consider seeking x types of organizations”. Since I’m in job seeking and career changing mode, I’ve focused on those actions for now. Again, don’t think it’s wise to immediately conclude “since this my strength, I should pursue this job”. However, I think there’s benefit to seeing if there are some broad themes to note and consider as I move forward. Also, some of the prescriptions do clash with one another, so maybe I can put less weight on those, or consider it in the context of all the others.
Here’s a recap of my test results:
Belief (95%), Inclusiveness (90%), Focus (85%), Input (80%), Learner (80%), Relator (80%)
Positivity (45%), Maximizer (45%), Competition (30%), Woo (25%)
I want to focus on both my high scores and low scores, so to learn some themes of maybe types of positions and organizations I should seek as well as avoid. Also, there is some element of “hey, wait a minute, all of these strengths could apply to everyone. Give me back my money!” So, it’s good to see those for where they are.
So, here’s a recap of some of the action items of my strengths focused exclusively on types of roles and organizations. My comments are in parentheses and italics:
STRENGTHS: (HIGHEST SCORES)
Belief: Seek roles that fit your values. Think about joining organizations that define their purpose by the contribution they make to society. (I partly decided to go to my business school b/c their mission to “educate leaders for business and society” resonated with me; this fits with an earlier blog post about my desire to do something that has a slightly more tangible impact on others)
Belief: Set aside time to ensure that you are balancing your work demands and your personal life. Your devotion to your career should not come at the expense of your strong commitment to family. (Part of why I disliked banking was because I had no time during the week to spend with family and friends. Ideally, I’d want more work-life balance, unless it was something I was super-passionate about.)
Includer: Look for opportunities to bring together people of diverse cultures and backgrounds. You can be a leader in this area. (Certainly valid, but not sure if this is a career objective. I enjoy caring for people who feel excluded.)
Includer: Choose roles in which you are continuously working and interacting with people. You will enjoy the challenge of making everyone feel important. (This conflicts with focus strength below.)
From bootleg website: Seek to work on things aimed at the common man; things for society's elite upsets you. (I think this resonates with me the most. I would feel dissatisfied working in private banking)
Focus: Seek roles in which you can function independently. With your dominant Focus talents, you will be able to stay on track with little supervision. (Yes, I like working alone, unless working with others means divvying up the tasks and working alone.)
Focus: You function well when you can concentrate on a few well-defined initiatives and demands. (Again, maybe why banking was not good b/c I was getting numerous tasks simultaneously from numerous senior bankers.)
Input: Look for jobs in which you are charged with acquiring new information each day, such as teaching, research, or journalism. (Interesting b/c I have uncles and aunts who are: school teachers, professors, and journalists – maybe this is where the Chung family thrives?)
Input: You might naturally be an exceptional repository of facts, data, and ideas. Don’t be afraid to position yourself as an expert in your field. (I am arguably a current expert on Jermey Lin)
From bootleg website: Seek opportunities to share your findings with others - speaking, blogging, videos, and articles. (I found this interesting b/c I’ve always loved blogging and always loved sharing information with others. I’ve talked several times in the past about how one of the themes of my life is “information proliferation.” This ties in with my includer strength about helping the common man.)
Learner: Seek roles that require some form of technical competence. You will enjoy the process of acquiring and maintaining this expertise.
Learner: Because you are not threatened by unfamiliar information, you might excel in a consulting role (either internal or external) in which you are paid to go into new situations and pick up new competencies or languages quickly. (I was a consultant in my prior role.)
Relator: Find a workplace in which friendships are encouraged. You will not do well in an overly formal organization. In job interviews, ask about work styles and company culture. (I think I’ve only ever worked in formal organizations, but probably enjoyed working on small consulting teams the most.)
And, here’s a recap of some of the action items of my lowest scores focused exclusively on types of roles and organizations (for context):
WEAKNESSES (LOWEST SCORES)
Woo (Winning over others): Choose a job in which you can interact with many people over the course of a day. (Probably not good for me, since I’m an introvert and meeting many people is draining.)
Competition: Select work environments in which you can measure your achievements. You might not be able to discover how good you can be without competing. (Aside: I think I’m the rare, strange person who actually works harder and performs better when there is no skin in the game. Some people enjoy putting a friendly wager and that motivates them to play harder. A friendly wager makes me dislike the competition – I enjoy competing for the sake itself. Also, the betting clashes with my desire to see a more just and equitable world. If I make more money than you, then why would I want to take money from you if I win this meaningless chess match? Or if you make more money than me, then why would I want to give money to you just because you’re faster than me at some meaningless race? This is like the exact opposite of Robin Hood – taking from the poor and giving to the rich!)
Maximizer: Seek roles in which you are helping people succeed. In coaching, managing, mentoring, or teaching, your focus on strengths will prove particularly beneficial to others. Because most people find it difficult to describe what they do best, start my arming them with vivid descriptions. (Needless to say, I’d probably be a bad career coach, since it’d be the blind leading the blind. Aside: For those of you who have read “The Paradox of Choice: Why Less is More”, I’m definitely a satisficer and not a maximizer. I like making a quick decision that satisfies my goals and move on with my life. I don’t like spending extra time trying to maximize my happiness – which could turn into a paralyzing endeavor.)
Positivity: You will probably excel in any role in which you are paid to highlight the positive. A teaching role, a sales role, an entrepreneurial role, or a leadership role will make the most of your ability to make things dramatic. (Yep, I’m a melancholy guy as default.)
This has been an interesting exercise. I think I still need to continue to think through these results over the next few days / weeks. But, my next step is to read through another book that was recommended by a family member: The Element by Ken Robinson. The tagline is “How finding your passion changes everything.” I think this book is more mini-biographies of individuals – less prescriptive, but hopefully enlightening and inspiring. Will read and blog on this book over the next few days.
Most of the book, then, goes into an explanation of each of the 34 strengths and providing some next steps. The book is careful about not being overly-prescriptive (Since this is your strength, you should pursue this career.) The book seems to focus on steps to address your strengths either in your job or outside your job. However, there are some action items that say stuff like “seek roles that do x, or consider seeking x types of organizations”. Since I’m in job seeking and career changing mode, I’ve focused on those actions for now. Again, don’t think it’s wise to immediately conclude “since this my strength, I should pursue this job”. However, I think there’s benefit to seeing if there are some broad themes to note and consider as I move forward. Also, some of the prescriptions do clash with one another, so maybe I can put less weight on those, or consider it in the context of all the others.
Here’s a recap of my test results:
Belief (95%), Inclusiveness (90%), Focus (85%), Input (80%), Learner (80%), Relator (80%)
Positivity (45%), Maximizer (45%), Competition (30%), Woo (25%)
I want to focus on both my high scores and low scores, so to learn some themes of maybe types of positions and organizations I should seek as well as avoid. Also, there is some element of “hey, wait a minute, all of these strengths could apply to everyone. Give me back my money!” So, it’s good to see those for where they are.
So, here’s a recap of some of the action items of my strengths focused exclusively on types of roles and organizations. My comments are in parentheses and italics:
STRENGTHS: (HIGHEST SCORES)
Belief: Seek roles that fit your values. Think about joining organizations that define their purpose by the contribution they make to society. (I partly decided to go to my business school b/c their mission to “educate leaders for business and society” resonated with me; this fits with an earlier blog post about my desire to do something that has a slightly more tangible impact on others)
Belief: Set aside time to ensure that you are balancing your work demands and your personal life. Your devotion to your career should not come at the expense of your strong commitment to family. (Part of why I disliked banking was because I had no time during the week to spend with family and friends. Ideally, I’d want more work-life balance, unless it was something I was super-passionate about.)
Includer: Look for opportunities to bring together people of diverse cultures and backgrounds. You can be a leader in this area. (Certainly valid, but not sure if this is a career objective. I enjoy caring for people who feel excluded.)
Includer: Choose roles in which you are continuously working and interacting with people. You will enjoy the challenge of making everyone feel important. (This conflicts with focus strength below.)
From bootleg website: Seek to work on things aimed at the common man; things for society's elite upsets you. (I think this resonates with me the most. I would feel dissatisfied working in private banking)
Focus: Seek roles in which you can function independently. With your dominant Focus talents, you will be able to stay on track with little supervision. (Yes, I like working alone, unless working with others means divvying up the tasks and working alone.)
Focus: You function well when you can concentrate on a few well-defined initiatives and demands. (Again, maybe why banking was not good b/c I was getting numerous tasks simultaneously from numerous senior bankers.)
Input: Look for jobs in which you are charged with acquiring new information each day, such as teaching, research, or journalism. (Interesting b/c I have uncles and aunts who are: school teachers, professors, and journalists – maybe this is where the Chung family thrives?)
Input: You might naturally be an exceptional repository of facts, data, and ideas. Don’t be afraid to position yourself as an expert in your field. (I am arguably a current expert on Jermey Lin)
From bootleg website: Seek opportunities to share your findings with others - speaking, blogging, videos, and articles. (I found this interesting b/c I’ve always loved blogging and always loved sharing information with others. I’ve talked several times in the past about how one of the themes of my life is “information proliferation.” This ties in with my includer strength about helping the common man.)
Learner: Seek roles that require some form of technical competence. You will enjoy the process of acquiring and maintaining this expertise.
Learner: Because you are not threatened by unfamiliar information, you might excel in a consulting role (either internal or external) in which you are paid to go into new situations and pick up new competencies or languages quickly. (I was a consultant in my prior role.)
Relator: Find a workplace in which friendships are encouraged. You will not do well in an overly formal organization. In job interviews, ask about work styles and company culture. (I think I’ve only ever worked in formal organizations, but probably enjoyed working on small consulting teams the most.)
And, here’s a recap of some of the action items of my lowest scores focused exclusively on types of roles and organizations (for context):
WEAKNESSES (LOWEST SCORES)
Woo (Winning over others): Choose a job in which you can interact with many people over the course of a day. (Probably not good for me, since I’m an introvert and meeting many people is draining.)
Competition: Select work environments in which you can measure your achievements. You might not be able to discover how good you can be without competing. (Aside: I think I’m the rare, strange person who actually works harder and performs better when there is no skin in the game. Some people enjoy putting a friendly wager and that motivates them to play harder. A friendly wager makes me dislike the competition – I enjoy competing for the sake itself. Also, the betting clashes with my desire to see a more just and equitable world. If I make more money than you, then why would I want to take money from you if I win this meaningless chess match? Or if you make more money than me, then why would I want to give money to you just because you’re faster than me at some meaningless race? This is like the exact opposite of Robin Hood – taking from the poor and giving to the rich!)
Maximizer: Seek roles in which you are helping people succeed. In coaching, managing, mentoring, or teaching, your focus on strengths will prove particularly beneficial to others. Because most people find it difficult to describe what they do best, start my arming them with vivid descriptions. (Needless to say, I’d probably be a bad career coach, since it’d be the blind leading the blind. Aside: For those of you who have read “The Paradox of Choice: Why Less is More”, I’m definitely a satisficer and not a maximizer. I like making a quick decision that satisfies my goals and move on with my life. I don’t like spending extra time trying to maximize my happiness – which could turn into a paralyzing endeavor.)
Positivity: You will probably excel in any role in which you are paid to highlight the positive. A teaching role, a sales role, an entrepreneurial role, or a leadership role will make the most of your ability to make things dramatic. (Yep, I’m a melancholy guy as default.)
This has been an interesting exercise. I think I still need to continue to think through these results over the next few days / weeks. But, my next step is to read through another book that was recommended by a family member: The Element by Ken Robinson. The tagline is “How finding your passion changes everything.” I think this book is more mini-biographies of individuals – less prescriptive, but hopefully enlightening and inspiring. Will read and blog on this book over the next few days.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Strengths Finder: Part I
I mentioned in my first post that I was recommended the book Strengths Finder, by Tom Rath, which includes an online self assessment. When you buy the book, you get an online code to take the official test. The downside to the official test is that it only provides you with your top five (out of 36) results. Luckily, I mentioned this test to another family member, and they found a bootleg copy of the test you can take for free, and will also give the full results. While I still plan on taking the official test (maybe a few days later to verify these results), the unofficial test seems pretty accurate. My wife also took it and felt it was accurate for her too.
Feel free to take the unofficial test yourself here:
http://richardstep.com/richardstep-strengths-finder-rssf/
Here’s a quick recap of my results:
Your Top 5 Strengths Are:
1. Belief (95%):
People strong in the Belief theme have certain core values that are unchanging. Out of these values emerges a defined purpose for their life.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Make efforts to discover your true passion and tie it to your work, no matter what you do.
o Align, but don't compromise, your values to that of your organization.
o You respect others for learning about your family and community - give them the opportunity.
o You give more value to greater levels of service than more money - let others know this.
o People may not share your beliefs, but you feel they need to understand & respect - let them.
2. Inclusiveness (90%):
People strong in the Inclusiveness theme are accepting of others. They show awareness of those who feel left out, and make an effort to include them.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively seek to work on orientation programs for new employees.
o Volunteer to lead a task force to recruit minority persons for your company or cause.
o Be in a position to handle organizing group functions - you are good at including everyone.
o You can break the barriers between customer and company - participate in relevant events.
o Seek to work on things aimed at the common man; things for society's elite upsets you.
o Actively try to be the link to community social agencies and causes.
3. Focus (85%):
People strong in the Focus theme can take a direction, follow through, and make the corrections necessary to stay on track. They prioritize, then act.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively set goals with specific timelines and figure out concrete ways to achieve them.
o You work best when you can control your work events - be aware and keep others informed.
o You thrive on regular check-ins and discussing goals progress - help others to understand this.
o Make efforts to avoid trampling on others' feelings as goals often take priority for you.
o Change is tough for you - ensure you talk and plan for change in terms of 'new goals to champion'.
o Schedule to attend a time management seminar and to incorporate the learnings in your daily routines.
o Stay away from unstructured meetings - they will be painful wastes of your time.
4. Input (80%):
People strong in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often they like to collect and archive all kinds of information.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively choose to research topics associated with your goals and company.
o You enjoy and should sign up for roles with a heavy research component.
o You are intrigued by facts and stories and would be a good mentor, teacher, or trainer.
o Keep up on the news and info on your areas of interest - constantly be in the know in your niche.
o Develop a robust system for digesting and storing the information you collect.
o Seek opportunities to share your findings with others - speaking, blogging, videos, and articles.
5. Learner (80%):
People strong in the Learner theme have a great desire to learn and want to continuously improve. In particular, the process of learning, rather than the outcome, excites them.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively take on roles that require you to stay current in a fast moving field.
o Always stay hunting for a richer learning environment - the process keeps you energized.
o Track your learning progress and celebrate milestones along the way.
o Challenge yourself to be a resident expert or master of trade on a subject.
o Request to work beside someone who will continuously push you to learn more.
o Learn by teaching others - do discussion groups and presentations at work and in your community.
o Set aside money to support continued education, training, seminars, and e-learning.
Without going through all of my scores, I’ll just highlight that my bottom five “strengths” were (and I thought it made sense that these were my weakest scores. Caveat: If I score so low on competition, it probably means I shouldn't have been a banker.):
Achiever (50%): People strong in the Achiever theme have a great deal of stamina and work hard. They take great satisfaction from being busy and productive.
Positivity (45%): People strong in the Positivity theme have an enthusiasm that is contagious. They are upbeat and can get others excited about what they are going to do.
Maximizer (45%): People strong in the Maximizer theme focus on strengths as a way to stimulate personal and group excellence. They seek to transform something strong into something superb.
Competition (30%): People strong in the Competition theme measure their progress against the performance of others. They strive to win first place and revel in contests.
Woo (25%): (WOO = Winning Others Over) People strong in the Woo theme love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. They derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection with another person.
I still need time to think through the meaning of these results, but I just wanted to highlight 1-2 descriptions in each strength section that particularly resonated with me.
Belief: Align, but don't compromise, your values to that of your organization.
Inclusiveness: Seek to work on things aimed at the common man; things for society's elite upsets you.
Focus: Stay away from unstructured meetings - they will be painful wastes of your time.
Input: Keep up on the news and info on your areas of interest - constantly be in the know in your niche. Seek opportunities to share your findings with others - speaking, blogging, videos, and articles.
Learner: Challenge yourself to be a resident expert or master of trade on a subject.
[I’m going to think through these results and also start reading the Strength Finders Book to help me determine how to understand the results and will post some of my reflections on another post.]
Of course, I think, with any of these types of tests, there’s reason to be a little skeptical. Yes, it’s probably dependent on mood and my current state of being. Yes, it’s probably a bit general enough that I’d still feel like it worked if it gave me other results. But even with these caveats, I still think there’s value to these tests - particularly if you take several over a period of time to control for external factors, and you still get some consistent level of results.
For example, I’ve taken the Myers-Briggs test at least twice, and probably 4-5 times, and I’ve always come out as either INFJ or ISFJ. I quickly googled and found that some possible career paths for my personality type are:
http://www.personalitypage.com/html/ISFJ_car.html
http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INFJ_car.html
While very few of the Myers-Briggs career options sound particularly appealing, some of them make sense. I enjoy teaching. (Maybe professor? Maybe continuing education within a firm.) When I was a consultant, I had to train about 250 employees about a new program we were launching. I had to give an overview of the program, and then walk step-by-step through the new procedures we were implementing. I had a really good time doing this and felt very much in my element.
If I couple “administrators” with “clergy”, I’ve always thought that one of my dream jobs would be a church administrator. High level of meaning and fits with my strengths. I think to justify the role, it’d have to be at a semi-big church that could pay a full-time salary. I’m guessing most small and medium-sized churches could probably get by with a part-time administrator and it’d be the best use of church money.
Anyway, I think the Strengths Finder results were pretty interesting and maybe a bit more helpful than the typical Myers-Briggs analysis, so will post more on this next time.
Feel free to take the unofficial test yourself here:
http://richardstep.com/richardstep-strengths-finder-rssf/
Here’s a quick recap of my results:
Your Top 5 Strengths Are:
1. Belief (95%):
People strong in the Belief theme have certain core values that are unchanging. Out of these values emerges a defined purpose for their life.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Make efforts to discover your true passion and tie it to your work, no matter what you do.
o Align, but don't compromise, your values to that of your organization.
o You respect others for learning about your family and community - give them the opportunity.
o You give more value to greater levels of service than more money - let others know this.
o People may not share your beliefs, but you feel they need to understand & respect - let them.
2. Inclusiveness (90%):
People strong in the Inclusiveness theme are accepting of others. They show awareness of those who feel left out, and make an effort to include them.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively seek to work on orientation programs for new employees.
o Volunteer to lead a task force to recruit minority persons for your company or cause.
o Be in a position to handle organizing group functions - you are good at including everyone.
o You can break the barriers between customer and company - participate in relevant events.
o Seek to work on things aimed at the common man; things for society's elite upsets you.
o Actively try to be the link to community social agencies and causes.
3. Focus (85%):
People strong in the Focus theme can take a direction, follow through, and make the corrections necessary to stay on track. They prioritize, then act.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively set goals with specific timelines and figure out concrete ways to achieve them.
o You work best when you can control your work events - be aware and keep others informed.
o You thrive on regular check-ins and discussing goals progress - help others to understand this.
o Make efforts to avoid trampling on others' feelings as goals often take priority for you.
o Change is tough for you - ensure you talk and plan for change in terms of 'new goals to champion'.
o Schedule to attend a time management seminar and to incorporate the learnings in your daily routines.
o Stay away from unstructured meetings - they will be painful wastes of your time.
4. Input (80%):
People strong in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often they like to collect and archive all kinds of information.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively choose to research topics associated with your goals and company.
o You enjoy and should sign up for roles with a heavy research component.
o You are intrigued by facts and stories and would be a good mentor, teacher, or trainer.
o Keep up on the news and info on your areas of interest - constantly be in the know in your niche.
o Develop a robust system for digesting and storing the information you collect.
o Seek opportunities to share your findings with others - speaking, blogging, videos, and articles.
5. Learner (80%):
People strong in the Learner theme have a great desire to learn and want to continuously improve. In particular, the process of learning, rather than the outcome, excites them.
Tips to Improve this Strength:
o Actively take on roles that require you to stay current in a fast moving field.
o Always stay hunting for a richer learning environment - the process keeps you energized.
o Track your learning progress and celebrate milestones along the way.
o Challenge yourself to be a resident expert or master of trade on a subject.
o Request to work beside someone who will continuously push you to learn more.
o Learn by teaching others - do discussion groups and presentations at work and in your community.
o Set aside money to support continued education, training, seminars, and e-learning.
Without going through all of my scores, I’ll just highlight that my bottom five “strengths” were (and I thought it made sense that these were my weakest scores. Caveat: If I score so low on competition, it probably means I shouldn't have been a banker.):
Achiever (50%): People strong in the Achiever theme have a great deal of stamina and work hard. They take great satisfaction from being busy and productive.
Positivity (45%): People strong in the Positivity theme have an enthusiasm that is contagious. They are upbeat and can get others excited about what they are going to do.
Maximizer (45%): People strong in the Maximizer theme focus on strengths as a way to stimulate personal and group excellence. They seek to transform something strong into something superb.
Competition (30%): People strong in the Competition theme measure their progress against the performance of others. They strive to win first place and revel in contests.
Woo (25%): (WOO = Winning Others Over) People strong in the Woo theme love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. They derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection with another person.
I still need time to think through the meaning of these results, but I just wanted to highlight 1-2 descriptions in each strength section that particularly resonated with me.
Belief: Align, but don't compromise, your values to that of your organization.
Inclusiveness: Seek to work on things aimed at the common man; things for society's elite upsets you.
Focus: Stay away from unstructured meetings - they will be painful wastes of your time.
Input: Keep up on the news and info on your areas of interest - constantly be in the know in your niche. Seek opportunities to share your findings with others - speaking, blogging, videos, and articles.
Learner: Challenge yourself to be a resident expert or master of trade on a subject.
[I’m going to think through these results and also start reading the Strength Finders Book to help me determine how to understand the results and will post some of my reflections on another post.]
Of course, I think, with any of these types of tests, there’s reason to be a little skeptical. Yes, it’s probably dependent on mood and my current state of being. Yes, it’s probably a bit general enough that I’d still feel like it worked if it gave me other results. But even with these caveats, I still think there’s value to these tests - particularly if you take several over a period of time to control for external factors, and you still get some consistent level of results.
For example, I’ve taken the Myers-Briggs test at least twice, and probably 4-5 times, and I’ve always come out as either INFJ or ISFJ. I quickly googled and found that some possible career paths for my personality type are:
http://www.personalitypage.com/html/ISFJ_car.html
http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INFJ_car.html
While very few of the Myers-Briggs career options sound particularly appealing, some of them make sense. I enjoy teaching. (Maybe professor? Maybe continuing education within a firm.) When I was a consultant, I had to train about 250 employees about a new program we were launching. I had to give an overview of the program, and then walk step-by-step through the new procedures we were implementing. I had a really good time doing this and felt very much in my element.
If I couple “administrators” with “clergy”, I’ve always thought that one of my dream jobs would be a church administrator. High level of meaning and fits with my strengths. I think to justify the role, it’d have to be at a semi-big church that could pay a full-time salary. I’m guessing most small and medium-sized churches could probably get by with a part-time administrator and it’d be the best use of church money.
Anyway, I think the Strengths Finder results were pretty interesting and maybe a bit more helpful than the typical Myers-Briggs analysis, so will post more on this next time.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Calling
I’m finding it very difficult to know where to start. I was thinking about going through and describing all my past jobs and why I took them, and what I liked and didn’t like about each one. Similarly, why I went to business school, what I liked and disliked about that experience. I went through this exercise in preparing for summer internship interviews in 2008, and I may do this again in a later post just to remind myself. But I thought I’d begin by writing about calling.
A long time ago, Tim Keller presented a good framework for understanding calling in a vocation. He said that you have a calling if you have affinity, ability, and opportunity. Affinity (you love/like it, it makes you get up in the morning, you feel a certain satisfaction from doing the work). Ability (you’re good at it and others around you confirm that you’re good at it, compared to others, it comes a bit naturally to you). And opportunity (it does something meaningful in the world, it helps you meet your basic needs, etc, doors are opened to you.)
You can listen to Tim Keller talk about this in the free Q&A section of the Redeemer web site.
http://www.redeemer.com/learn/resources/keller_qa.html
I’ve always found the general framework extremely helpful, but I’ve found the application of it quite difficult, particularly on the first two points. I think it’s a privilege to love what you do and be good at it. And I think not everyone gets to enjoy those two points to a high degree. So, it’s hard to decide how important those two factors should be for me. When I look back on my short career, I think there were 2-3 moments when I really enjoyed the work I was doing – and this coincided with what I was good at.
First, when I was a watch analyst in government, I monitored world events and reports coming in from around the world and distilled it and provided this information to senior policymakers in a timely manner. (This is same skill set I’m currently using to update the LINcredibles web site.) While I enjoyed this work, it also came with the “any monkey could do this job” feeling (even though that’s not necessarily true). It is true that you didn’t need to be smart and the job didn’t require high level thinking. But I was better at it than others because I could tolerate boredom and repetition better than others and I had a much higher sense of urgency than others. I basically could stare at a computer screen and click refresh often forever, while others would get tired of it very quickly. I’m not necessarily proud of this, but it’s a trait / skill I have, not sure why.
Second, when I was a consultant to government agencies, on two occasions, I helped newly formed groups come up with new processes and procedures to meet their goals and objectives. These jobs were enjoyable because I felt like I was making some tangible difference in the world. Something didn’t exist before, and now it did because of my work. Third, when I was a consultant to a water company, I helped design and develop a new collection program to collect unpaid water bills from delinquent customers. I also helped create a safety net program to ensure the poor, elderly, and disabled continued to get water service. Again, felt good because this was $x million that the agency didn’t have before, and now it did because of our work. I think I enjoy more operational roles rather than the stereotypical consulting jobs where you come in and provide some recommendations and leave. I think I would find that dissatisfying. Even though it’s less glamorous, I want to be the guy doing the actual work. I ended up quitting consulting and going to business school because I felt like I hit a wall in terms of what I knew how to do. Other senior people came up with the ideas, and I was just one of the people doing the work.
[No transition.]
I think it’s great when some people I meet have a clear sense of calling, and I think some professions lend itself to that more easily: pastor, doctor, nurse, teacher, etc. In these professions, it’s a bit more tangible to see how you are helping others or making the world a better place. I think for me, the sense of calling will likely be less tangible because I am not inclined to take those other professions. But, after working in investment banking, I think I need to have a sense of calling in my profession that is a bit more tangible than “I help hospitals raise money and save money by issuing bonds”. I think the tangible impact to individuals is too far removed. Also, the argument of “I’m going to make a lot of money, so that I can give a lot of money to my church and causes I believe in” doesn’t motivate me enough to stay in a bad job. Maybe it could be different if I was giving away millions of dollars, but not when I’m giving away thousands of dollars. The impact is so minimal to tolerate it.
I admire some of the people I know who have a “semi-secular” job, but are making a noticeable “kingdom” impact. Examples are: an uncle who works for a seminary bookstore and has run it so efficiently and well that it makes money for the seminary and provides excellent service for its customers. He helps provide quality Christian literature to the masses. (http://www.wtsbooks.com/) Or a friend who founded a non-profit in China that encourages efficiency and transparency in Chinese philanthropy. (http://blog.socialventuregroup.com/). She is helping to ensure that the poor and marginalized in China are not left behind in China’s transition to capitalism. That’s pretty cool stuff.
I am wondering if I need to work in a field that gives me more of a tangible feeling of helping others. One idea I’ve thought of in the past is: being a financial planner that helps average people make good decisions saving for retirement (basically just invest in a diverse set of low cost index funds). I know LINcredibles isn’t a job, but one reason I absolutely love working on this during my time off is because I truly believe Jeremy Lin’s story could have a tremendous impact for evangelizing in China and Asia (so long as it doesn’t turn into a prosperity gospel that is preached). And while our overseas readership is limited, I still think popularizing God’s faithfulness to him is worthy.
It’s be great to hear about how others have determined their sense of calling in their professions and also feedback on my conclusion that I need to find a line of work that is a bit more tangibly beneficial to society.
A long time ago, Tim Keller presented a good framework for understanding calling in a vocation. He said that you have a calling if you have affinity, ability, and opportunity. Affinity (you love/like it, it makes you get up in the morning, you feel a certain satisfaction from doing the work). Ability (you’re good at it and others around you confirm that you’re good at it, compared to others, it comes a bit naturally to you). And opportunity (it does something meaningful in the world, it helps you meet your basic needs, etc, doors are opened to you.)
You can listen to Tim Keller talk about this in the free Q&A section of the Redeemer web site.
http://www.redeemer.com/learn/resources/keller_qa.html
I’ve always found the general framework extremely helpful, but I’ve found the application of it quite difficult, particularly on the first two points. I think it’s a privilege to love what you do and be good at it. And I think not everyone gets to enjoy those two points to a high degree. So, it’s hard to decide how important those two factors should be for me. When I look back on my short career, I think there were 2-3 moments when I really enjoyed the work I was doing – and this coincided with what I was good at.
First, when I was a watch analyst in government, I monitored world events and reports coming in from around the world and distilled it and provided this information to senior policymakers in a timely manner. (This is same skill set I’m currently using to update the LINcredibles web site.) While I enjoyed this work, it also came with the “any monkey could do this job” feeling (even though that’s not necessarily true). It is true that you didn’t need to be smart and the job didn’t require high level thinking. But I was better at it than others because I could tolerate boredom and repetition better than others and I had a much higher sense of urgency than others. I basically could stare at a computer screen and click refresh often forever, while others would get tired of it very quickly. I’m not necessarily proud of this, but it’s a trait / skill I have, not sure why.
Second, when I was a consultant to government agencies, on two occasions, I helped newly formed groups come up with new processes and procedures to meet their goals and objectives. These jobs were enjoyable because I felt like I was making some tangible difference in the world. Something didn’t exist before, and now it did because of my work. Third, when I was a consultant to a water company, I helped design and develop a new collection program to collect unpaid water bills from delinquent customers. I also helped create a safety net program to ensure the poor, elderly, and disabled continued to get water service. Again, felt good because this was $x million that the agency didn’t have before, and now it did because of our work. I think I enjoy more operational roles rather than the stereotypical consulting jobs where you come in and provide some recommendations and leave. I think I would find that dissatisfying. Even though it’s less glamorous, I want to be the guy doing the actual work. I ended up quitting consulting and going to business school because I felt like I hit a wall in terms of what I knew how to do. Other senior people came up with the ideas, and I was just one of the people doing the work.
[No transition.]
I think it’s great when some people I meet have a clear sense of calling, and I think some professions lend itself to that more easily: pastor, doctor, nurse, teacher, etc. In these professions, it’s a bit more tangible to see how you are helping others or making the world a better place. I think for me, the sense of calling will likely be less tangible because I am not inclined to take those other professions. But, after working in investment banking, I think I need to have a sense of calling in my profession that is a bit more tangible than “I help hospitals raise money and save money by issuing bonds”. I think the tangible impact to individuals is too far removed. Also, the argument of “I’m going to make a lot of money, so that I can give a lot of money to my church and causes I believe in” doesn’t motivate me enough to stay in a bad job. Maybe it could be different if I was giving away millions of dollars, but not when I’m giving away thousands of dollars. The impact is so minimal to tolerate it.
I admire some of the people I know who have a “semi-secular” job, but are making a noticeable “kingdom” impact. Examples are: an uncle who works for a seminary bookstore and has run it so efficiently and well that it makes money for the seminary and provides excellent service for its customers. He helps provide quality Christian literature to the masses. (http://www.wtsbooks.com/) Or a friend who founded a non-profit in China that encourages efficiency and transparency in Chinese philanthropy. (http://blog.socialventuregroup.com/). She is helping to ensure that the poor and marginalized in China are not left behind in China’s transition to capitalism. That’s pretty cool stuff.
I am wondering if I need to work in a field that gives me more of a tangible feeling of helping others. One idea I’ve thought of in the past is: being a financial planner that helps average people make good decisions saving for retirement (basically just invest in a diverse set of low cost index funds). I know LINcredibles isn’t a job, but one reason I absolutely love working on this during my time off is because I truly believe Jeremy Lin’s story could have a tremendous impact for evangelizing in China and Asia (so long as it doesn’t turn into a prosperity gospel that is preached). And while our overseas readership is limited, I still think popularizing God’s faithfulness to him is worthy.
It’s be great to hear about how others have determined their sense of calling in their professions and also feedback on my conclusion that I need to find a line of work that is a bit more tangibly beneficial to society.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Starting the Blog
On Friday, February 10, 2012, I quit my job working as an investment banker. In some ways, the decision was easy: I hated my job. I had wanted to quit for a long time. I was deeply unhappy. I was stressed out all the time. It wasn’t the right fit for me. I felt like I had no free time to pursue other endeavors. It affected my mood, my attitude, my personality and maybe even my character. It affected my marriage and my relationships with others.
However, in other ways, the decision was difficult: I did not have another job lined up. I have a wife on unpaid maternity leave. I have a six-month-old child. It was a reputable job at a reputable firm and I am giving up a big salary, prestige and everything else that comes with those things, like lifestyle, status, etc. My parents are disappointed and sad that I didn’t stay. The economy is still bad and I’m a little worried about the potential for long-term unemployment. I’m also worried about looking like an irresponsible bum to others, particularly my family and extended family.
The purpose of this blog is to share my thoughts and reflections from my experience quitting a job, trying to find out what to do next, and trying to find a new job. In sharing about why I quit, I hope to help myself debrief and get a better understanding about what didn’t work. In sharing about what to do next, I hope to stay motivated and driven to soul search and find out what I’m good at, what I’m passionate about, etc. And in sharing about the job search process, I hope to stay focused on finding a new job at the appropriate time. In posting my thoughts onto this blog, I hope to share with my friends what I am going through, receive support, and elicit feedback from my friends. And perhaps, it may also help you process some of your own thoughts.
I acknowledge that I am in an extremely fortunate position. I have a wife who can, will, and wants to return to work in May to a nice law firm job which she loves and pays well. We no longer have any grad school loans to worry about. And we have some money saved up. In fact, we are taking this opportunity to travel overseas to my wife’s home in Australia. We are leaving today and will return to the U.S in six weeks. This gives us a good amount of time to spend time away, introduce our young child to extended family, and do spend some dedicated time decompressing and brainstorming about next steps. It’s already been a tremendous blessing to be able to relax for the last two weeks even before our trip.
Because of this fortunate circumstance, I want to take advantage of this opportunity to be patient and thorough in doing my brainstorming. I want to be methodical and diligent. I don’t want to rush into anything. However, I also want to move the process along and not be lazy or waste my time. As mentioned above, I see this entire process in 3 stages: looking back historically, reflecting on my current passions and abilities, and then developing a plan to find a new job. I’m not sure how long each will take, mainly because it is out of my control. But, I think my initial plan is to spend about 1-2 weeks on the first part: looking back and reflecting on my past jobs and what worked and didn’t work. And we’ll take it from there.
One book that was recommended to me by a family member was Strength Finder by Tom Rath.
http://www.strengthsfinder.com/home.aspx
The book also includes an online self-assessment. I’m planning on reading this book and taking the assessment during “stage 2”, but I may start earlier. I think at a minimum, it will be helpful toward discerning what some of my potential next steps could be. If you have another book that you recommend, I’d definitely consider reading it.
Boarding a plane in a few hours, so will post again from abroad. I may try to write some thoughts on the plane if I get the chance. Thanks for reading!
However, in other ways, the decision was difficult: I did not have another job lined up. I have a wife on unpaid maternity leave. I have a six-month-old child. It was a reputable job at a reputable firm and I am giving up a big salary, prestige and everything else that comes with those things, like lifestyle, status, etc. My parents are disappointed and sad that I didn’t stay. The economy is still bad and I’m a little worried about the potential for long-term unemployment. I’m also worried about looking like an irresponsible bum to others, particularly my family and extended family.
The purpose of this blog is to share my thoughts and reflections from my experience quitting a job, trying to find out what to do next, and trying to find a new job. In sharing about why I quit, I hope to help myself debrief and get a better understanding about what didn’t work. In sharing about what to do next, I hope to stay motivated and driven to soul search and find out what I’m good at, what I’m passionate about, etc. And in sharing about the job search process, I hope to stay focused on finding a new job at the appropriate time. In posting my thoughts onto this blog, I hope to share with my friends what I am going through, receive support, and elicit feedback from my friends. And perhaps, it may also help you process some of your own thoughts.
I acknowledge that I am in an extremely fortunate position. I have a wife who can, will, and wants to return to work in May to a nice law firm job which she loves and pays well. We no longer have any grad school loans to worry about. And we have some money saved up. In fact, we are taking this opportunity to travel overseas to my wife’s home in Australia. We are leaving today and will return to the U.S in six weeks. This gives us a good amount of time to spend time away, introduce our young child to extended family, and do spend some dedicated time decompressing and brainstorming about next steps. It’s already been a tremendous blessing to be able to relax for the last two weeks even before our trip.
Because of this fortunate circumstance, I want to take advantage of this opportunity to be patient and thorough in doing my brainstorming. I want to be methodical and diligent. I don’t want to rush into anything. However, I also want to move the process along and not be lazy or waste my time. As mentioned above, I see this entire process in 3 stages: looking back historically, reflecting on my current passions and abilities, and then developing a plan to find a new job. I’m not sure how long each will take, mainly because it is out of my control. But, I think my initial plan is to spend about 1-2 weeks on the first part: looking back and reflecting on my past jobs and what worked and didn’t work. And we’ll take it from there.
One book that was recommended to me by a family member was Strength Finder by Tom Rath.
http://www.strengthsfinder.com/home.aspx
The book also includes an online self-assessment. I’m planning on reading this book and taking the assessment during “stage 2”, but I may start earlier. I think at a minimum, it will be helpful toward discerning what some of my potential next steps could be. If you have another book that you recommend, I’d definitely consider reading it.
Boarding a plane in a few hours, so will post again from abroad. I may try to write some thoughts on the plane if I get the chance. Thanks for reading!
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