Some good news to report. I have an interview scheduled in a couple weeks for the city government position in an operations/implementation role that I applied for. I'm looking forward to it and seeing if there's an opportunity for me there. In the meantime, in case this opportunity falls through, I plan on continuing to stick with my plan of meeting people, catching up with old co-workers and school friends, particularly starting in June when my son starts daycare 3x a week. This will free up some days for me to go meet people.
I met up with a former co-worker of mine from my banking job. She left several months before I did. We both are so happy to be out. She was updating me on the recent goings on at our old firm. Apparently several people we worked with also departed in the last couple months and also there was a round of layoffs. It reiterated my view that banks just churn junior staff and run them into the ground. If they leave, who cares - just hire a new batch and keep moving forward. The recent news about JPM CIO losing $2 bn and MS potentially selectively disclosing information in the run-up to Facebook's IPO doesn't surprise me. A bunch of people will get fired, and new people will back-fill those roles - just keep moving forward.
Several weeks ago, I was asking my wife what her hopes and dreams were for our son. She said, "I just hope he doesn't become a menace to society. No, I'm serious!" She was semi-serious. We both have a fairly laid-back attitude towards parenting, which some have commended us for. Neither of us grew up with Tiger parents. We grew up in non-competitive environments. We had fairly normal childhoods and we turned out okay. I think we want our kids to have something similar.
But I realized recently that I probably should be giving a little more effort - a little bit more deliberateness - in the parenting department. A couple weeks ago, we had a doctor's appointment for our son. His motor skills and mental development are on pace. However, he hasn't gained weight in a few months, causing some concern. The doctor told us we need to make a deliberate effort to feed him more food, things like bananas, avocados, bits of chicken, etc. It's quite likely that he's just going to be a small baby because he's Asian. Apparently, I was very small and refused to eat when I was very little. Still, this got me thinking a bit. I also realized my default these days is to sit on the couch, turn on the TV to Nickelodeon and have my son get distracted by the TV. Again, feeling a bit convicted that I need to be a bit more deliberate in being a SAHD.
When I think about psycho-intense parents, I find it repulsive. But this aversion and my sinfulness taints my view of any kind of effort put into parenting. It's so easy for me to self-righteously think to myself, "Oh, my hope is in Christ, not in my abilities as a parent. Look at those other people, idolizing their kids, making an idol out of their parenting abilities. Trying to make their life meaningful by being a good parent. Going crazy on the internet looking at this blog and that, becoming obsessed. Their lives are completely revolving around their kids. Look how unlike them I am." Obviously this line of thinking is wrong. I wrongly have different standards for me and others. When I read parenting books or buy educational DVDs, it's always in moderate amounts; but when others do it, it's because their psycho-intense.
So anyway, two realizations. First, I need to be more gracious when I hear about other people's kids. Whether it be trying to get into a competitive pre-school, their latest exploits posted to Facebook, or whatever. It's good to put a little effort into parenting. It's what we're supposed to do. Second, I need to be more deliberate in my parenting. I think I had the attitude that nothing really matters until around 1.5 years old when he can start talking and doing stuff. I recently bought some DVDs to begin teaching my son to learn letters and numbers. I'm also going to play with my son a bit more - helping him practice his motor skills. Right now, he can hold on to the side of the crib and walk a bit. When he reaches for things he shouldn't, I'm going to start saying "No" to him, before I just grab him and move him elsewhere. Maybe he'll start understanding. Also, I have to feed this guy more food. Need to put a little bit more effort please.
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